my big day in preperation

This is the end of the line.

2011-05-18T06:44:00.001-07:00

This is the end of the line. It has taken me a few weeks to admit but we were not working. I dont expect everyone to understand but i am moving on and i have never been this happy in a long time. So thanks for reading along and you never know i may be back sometime with the next chapter.

so touching

2011-05-03T04:03:00.000-07:00

I just had to post this link, someone put it on facebook and i cried, i couldnt believe it. Take a look....

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=1355014174247

teary time

2011-04-30T01:59:00.000-07:00

As i think everyone on the planet knows that yesterday was the royal wedding and i have to say i was looking forward to it for quite some time. Mostly because i wanted to see the dress but i also wanted to see the look on williams face when he saw kate, that was a priceless moment. I do love the dress so much, it was spectacular (i wish i was able to get away with a dress like that) but i had vissions of her wearing something more like what her sister was wearing just with a longer train to show off her amazing figure, but she looked so beautiful i dont think the dress would really change much for her.

There was just a few things about the wedding that got to me and made me unable to watch it all. I managed to see up until he had given her her ring but i had to excuse myself to the bathroom, i got so upset that its going to be even longer until i am in that position, not that i will be marrying a prince of england or having people from all over the world and celebrities to my wedding but to me my little wedding would still have made me feel like a princess. Not knowing when our wedding will be is really getting to me. Maybe if money was no problem then i dont thing i would have so much stress and i could set another date but with all of our problems that need to be resolved are mostly issues that involve money which really doesnt help.

Another excuse i had to leave watching the wedding is Mimi had to go to the vets during the wedding (we got back as they were coming out of the church). With cavaliers they have a common problem with their knees, well i have noticed that Mimi walks with her legs straight sometimes and it has gotten significantly more frequant so i was keeping an eye on her and i saw her knees wobble as she walked away from me, at the vets they confirmed what i thought, she has luxating patella on her back right leg and maybe on her back left, she is booked in for a consult with the ortho on friday and to have sedation and xrays. I got a little upset as she is still just a puppy (10 months) but they said it is better to get it sorted sooner rather than later. If the ortho thinks it is serious she may need surgery which seems like a big step. I am just hoping its not going to cost too much as there are limits to her insurance and just the consult, sedation and xrays are going to cost just under £160 which is quite expensive but i have seen somebodies quote for surgery and that was £1200. I will keep you updated with what happens.

Little bit of a change in the big day

2011-04-28T04:56:00.000-07:00

Well there is still going to be a big day just not of the wedding variety (well for a little while anyways). Let me explain.

Next year me and Dave turn 25 (no not on the same day and we are not some backwards inbread incestuous twins either). Daves birthday is in march and mine is in september so last night we decided there was need for some fun next year so we decided we would have a big joint 25th birthday party, even better it will be fancy dress. As i have posted before i love dressing up, i do it for christmas at work, for charity fun runs give me an excuse and i will dress for it. So we decided that we will maybe have it around june or july which is in the middle so i will be having a premature quarter of a century party. I was in a little world of my own after we decided as to what i would dres up as and here were some of my choices and the reasons.

Pirate.

I always wanted a pirate party, i just think it would be so fun and i would get to burn invitations and things like that and make treasure maps for directions, but i dont think everyone would be all for that and so either wouldnt come or they wouldnt dress up.

Rocky horror.

I love the rocky horror picture show, i have watched it so many times and i even have the glee special soundtrack too, yes i am a gleek but who can blame me right? well i thought i could be Janet for the first half then change into something a little more racy later but then i thought. I really dont want to see the likes of my dad, brother and some friends in not much more than underwear, the thought makes me a little bit on the ill side so thats not really a good idea.

Jessica Rabbit.

I loved the way she looked with her red dress, long legs and red hair, she was what a real woman would look like to me, she had amazing curves. I dont think i have a reason not to go for this option apart from i dont want to wear a wig but im also not sure if i want to dye my hair red either.

Pageant queen.

I never got to have a prom in school but always wanted to wear an amazing gown, other than a wedding dress obviously, but i never got to wear one so i thought if i got a gown, sash and a crown i could go as a pageant queen. Only thing is the price of the gown, sash and crown.

Avatar (navi).

Since i found out about this movie i loved the look of the navi, one problem i just dont have the body shape to walk around in a skin tight blue suit, if i ever got that small this would be my first choice but i dont think i could pull it off.

I will re post when i think of something else.

Its on hold

2011-04-09T10:46:00.000-07:00

That's right we have had to put the wedding on hold. We don't know how long for but we had taken on way too much and i ended up breaking down. I am not in a stable position to deal with this right now, it is still the one thing i want but it cant happen just yet, not when this is something we have control over and that we don't really have to do but other things in our lives right now we cant control and that need to take priority. I am quite upset that we have to do this but we cant see a way of dealing with it all at once, i feel like i have to be wonder woman sometimes to deal with it but i just don't have the powers. It was hard but we both had to take a long hard look at our lives and we had a hard decision to make as we will lose a lot in deposits but we know that we probably wouldn't even make it to the wedding if we pushed ourselves anymore we would either end up in a mental institute or something worse. There are a few things we need to sort out but they are major things and they cant be ignored, they may bring us closer but if they don't get sorted i fear they will push us apart.

chair covers

2011-04-05T17:12:00.000-07:00

I have been a little bit reluctant to post anything about the wedding lately as once i had found what i thought was a great deal it either fell through or there were catches but we finally have chair covers, well we don't have them as such but i sent off the cheque for them today, they are £1.95 per chair and that includes a sash so we ordered 85 of those then we have to add one a £50 deposit that will also play as a security deposit so we will get that back 2 weeks after the wedding if everything is all in order. so in the last month i have written cheques of over £230 just on deposits which does feel a bit sickening but i suppose it has to be done.

So we have the following off the top of my head there are probably a few things i have forgotten:
Church
Hotel
Photographer
Chair covers
My dress
My shoes
My tiara
Bridesmaids shoes
Cuff links
Stationary stock
1/3 of the jars/vases/bowls for candies
Hundreds of candles
Items for centre pieces
Some decorations e.g bows
Dj for reception
Cake

I know there has to be something i have forgot but it is past 1am so i cant really be blamed can i.

Im so stressed

2011-03-30T05:27:00.000-07:00

I really don't know what to do.....I am having all these problems at work and i really don't need the stress right now.

I have wrote about someone called Ewa before well, i was at work on Monday and she waited till about 10 minutes before we finished work to come over and corner me and ask if i had a mental problem, i had no idea what she was talking about but i found this very insulting because i have suffered with manic depression since i was in school, so i don't respect someone asking that. Anyway then she went on telling me i should stop talking about her on facebook because people are laughing at her....i had no idea what she was talking about again, yes i put something on facebook at the time she was talking about but i cant help the fact that she thinks the world revolves around her and that maybe this status wasn't about her, i dont get why people think they can use my personal facebook page as ammunition at work? So i just said it wasn't like she doesn't talk about me or anyone else to her friends but in her own language, to which she said yes she does and we are all women so what do i expect.......erm am i the only one who wants to know why its ok for people to talk about others because we are women but if i did say anything about her why she has a problem with it. Then she went to swear at me but stopped and said she wasn't going to say it because she was not like my mom (my mom swore in front of one of her friends when they had moved her work back just before Christmas) then i said she was exactly the same because she went to say it, then she proceeded to tell me to f**k off numerous times while waffling on about me growing up and stop causing trouble, when i got a word in a told her that she was in the wrong because she came to my work area and left hers just to have a go and intimidate my by standing over me while saying all this and just reading into things that wernt about her. She must have been looking for something to pin on me because she would have read the status then had to click to read more comments from what she told me she had read. As we had words before why would she feel the need to search my page and statuses for unless she was waiting for something to have a rant about. I will put a copy of the conversation between me and my friend that was on facebook so that you can see nowhere are there any names. I got worked up after she walked away when other people started turning up for the night shift so when i was ready to leave i told her if she had a problem with something outside of work then tell me outside of work, to which she flew off again saying i am the one with the problem and i should grow up, i sad she was the one who needed to grow up and how old is she, all she could say was how old am i?..... Well i am 24 this year she is 30 i think 6 years is a lot of time to mature to her standards and her sophistication (not that i would want to if that's how you act). In the end all i could think was she did it at the end of work hoping she could just go home and i would drop it and hoping the head of shift would have already left. I personally think she has some sort of attention disorder like she has to make sure everything is about her even if its not. Not long ago i woke up to people asking if i was ok i didn't under stand but when i went onto facebook i understand why, someone had set up a fake facebook page with my name and commented on every single picture that i was in with the word 'fake' now i have like 400 pictures with me in on there and every time they commented i got an email, looking at the times of the emails it took them about an hour and half and finished about 1:30 in the morning, don't that sound a little bit suspicious as the same week our clock-in cards were being moved. I told all of this to the head of shift nick and he said not to take it further as he will sort it and has it....no it got worse obviously when she was looming over me with her rant. So i rang ACAS who are like a union and told them the situation and what i should do about it, the lady said that it sounded like serious intimidation and should be taken higher which would be to write an official grievance letter to the manager saying what happened and to request a meeting to see how this is going to be solved. which i did. Nick wasn't pleased and didn't speak to me at all last night after he found out i had gone higher than him and gone to Geoff, but what does he expect when he was going round saying he would tell them but did nothing and then last night my mom herd him talking to other people about it. I was supposed to have a meeting today before work but i got a phone call saying the owners were thankful with the way i had dealt with things so far and they would do everything official so i should be getting a letter maybe today to say when the meeting is, i was also told the Ewa was not told about any of this so if i do get any comments from her i know who has told her. I am also allowed someone in the meeting with me so i asked June if she will come with me but it depends when it is now as i don't want to drag her down if it is out of work hours, she knows that i need the fertility treatment and is always asking how i am coping and am i dealing with the stresses so she knows what I'm going through. I have been pushed around way too much in my life and I'm not going to just push it away anymore. The only thing i am really bothered about is when ever one of the polish get told off for anything they pull the racist card, that would hurt me so much because i am the most un racist person in the world, i went to a primary school and secondary school when white English kids were the minority and so i have been bought up to see that as normal, one of my best friends in primary school was a refugee from Albania so how can i be racist???

This is what was put on facebook, where does that say anything spacific to a person? where is her name?

Amy Whittaker

At what age is it inappropriate to look like an over grown toddler???? I think someone missed the memo lol
25 March at 17:47 via Android · Friends only ·LikeUnlike · · View feedback (8)Hide feedback (8).
Hayley Smith and Kimberley Meekcom like this..

Adele Cashmore Funniest status I've read in a while!
25 March at 21:52 · LikeUnlike.

Amy Whittaker Its even funnier if you could see the person its about all i will say is a headband ok but a bow???? And they are like 30 lol
25 March at 22:08 · LikeUnlike.

Adele Cashmore When you mentioned toddler I had the image of a 30 year old woman in a baby grow or something similar!
25 March at 22:09 · LikeUnlike.

Amy Whittaker Not quite but i wouldnt put it past this person to wear something just as bad like a ribbon in their hair with dungrees (cant spell it sorry lol)
25 March at 22:15 · LikeUnlike.

Adele Cashmore This person sounds like a sight to be seen!
25 March at 22:18 · LikeUnlike.

Amy Whittaker She sure is
25 March at 22:22 · LikeUnlike
Any way i could really do with some chill out time. I cant wait for the Easter holidays!!!!!!

I missed it :'(

2011-03-21T16:47:00.000-07:00

I was just looking back at some of my posts and i cant believe i missed my blogaversary......i posted my first post on the 18th march 2010, it doesn't seem like i have been waffling on that long, lol.

Oh well my blog is now 1 year and 3 days old....

cheque...check

2011-03-21T16:29:00.000-07:00

I mailed the check to the photographer last Monday and he rang on Friday i think it was saying he got the cheque and would be sorting out the paperwork, so now we really do have a photographer. Then my brother went on a little kiddy tantrum that he wasn't coming to the wedding because he cant take pictures, i said he can take pictures but if he is one of the groomsmen he is supposed to be down front with the rest of us and he is going to be n the pictures so wont the pictures look a little bit stupid with him standing there taking pictures too?? i never got another answer from him about that. I was saying to my mom, i don't have a problem with him taking pictures but if he does then he will have to step down from being groomsman and sit in the congregation like everyone else and if its like some churches they only allow the official photographer to mill around taking the pictures and even then they have rules, its like the best man has a professional video camera which we can use but he knows he wont be using it so he is going to show his brother how to do it in advance so he can be there to do that so my photos don't have my best man stood behind a camera.

Another good thing about our photographer is he has shot at our venues, that's all of them, the church himley hall and the hotel so he knows the best places to be, some great shots that can be had and some good set up shots too which is great, we got to see some of the pictures from himley hall as that was in one of the preview albums he was showing us. We also asked all the questions about copy write too and we get printable rights. This means we can go else where and get prints, books, canvases, anything we want, the only thing we cannot do is sell the pictures, but i don't see why i would be selling the pictures anyway. As we picked the cd package we get 2 cds, one with colour photos and one with black and white, all which have been 'fixed' if needed. We also get a proof folder so we can look through them all and even if we want to go back at a later date and order prints or albums we can.

Love it magazine

2011-03-14T16:33:00.000-07:00

I love 'love it' magazine, i get it almost every week and there is always something in there that shocks me. But while i was looking through last week i thought im gonna send a picture of my puppy in to them just for the sake of it, so i went on the website and while looking i found this section where you can apply to try a diet from them, they supply everything and i can be in the mag. i thought why not reply i never get picked for anything right.....wrong....i had a girl from the magazine ring me today asking if i was up for it and i said yea so she will get back to me with more details, wow, i normally never like to really show myself or 'air my dirt laundry' as some may say but, i am so desperate at the moment to lose the weight i am willing to try anything, i finished weight watchers just 3 lbs less than when i started, i felt so ashamed, but for me i always felt like i was eating way to much while on it, like i eat a lot of fruit and veg anyway but as they are no points they dont cound then i was allowed 33 daily points then my weekly 49 and i was using no where near that unless we were going out for something like pizza and they were saying i should be sticking to my points but that was a lot of food for me, especially when i was under the nutritionalist before and they said as long as i was not feeling weak or like i was going to faint and i had enough energy i could manage on one meal a day, and that was from the hospital so from going from that where i managed to lose a lot of weight before to having to eat so much with weight watchers i couldnt put my finger on why i wasnt losing the weight. They also kept talking about how things like hormones and thyroid problems have nothing to do with weight, well that really bothered me because i have already done my research and hormones do play a major roll and this is a reason why someone with PCOS like me has problems losing weight but they wouldnt see that, just the weight watchers formula and it works there is proof, but i just wanted to scream and say please live my life work my work deal with my stresses and then deal with the hormonal imbalance and show me how easy it is to lose weight because im not playing around, i need to lose this weight if i have any chance at a family and even just for that reason only i would try anything but i know starving myself will do more harm than good.

How can i win?????

We have a photographer

2011-03-12T13:02:00.000-08:00

Yes that is right...well when i send this cheque and booking form back to the guy that is.....

We had a meeting with a guy me and my mom met at a wedding fayre at the hotel we are having and i thought there was just something about him that made me like him, he had over 30 years experience, 100's of weddings under his belt and not only is he a wedding photographer he is a general professional photographer, he does modeling shoots, advertising shoots, he even told us he has had to photo almost everything you can think of even down to this months project of photographing sockets, yes like the plug sockets, lol. He said he has been doing photography since he was 16 and has never thought of doing anything else. His work is amazing and he has shot at the places we are having so we could see how those turned out, which were great. The package starts with me at home (or in the hotel in my case) then he rushes off to meet Dave at the church, then takes his place in the church and does the usual church work, then gives us time to mingle after while taking the candid shots, then set up for the traditional shots, then travel to himley with us for more photos then to the hotel until the wedding breakfast. We decided we were going with the basic CD package to start then after we can decide to go back and order albums or prints if we want and all of this for £750 which i think is great for the quality and friendliness he would bring.

Now all i have to do is write the cheque and fill in the forms and send them off.

One thing down so many more to go.

Millies cookies

2011-03-10T06:00:00.000-08:00

I think i have an obsession and need to go to confession, well as i don't go to confession i will just confess on here.

Ever since i had my first Millie's cookie i knew they were something else, now most of the time when i go to the shopping centre i try to avoid it as i never just get 1 or 2 i get the share box of 12!!! Which is what i did today. While the guy was wrapping them i saw they did a years supply for £35 so i asked how many that was exactly. He said for the £35 you get 12 gift cards that are worth one 12 share box, which works out to be half price, it sounded like a good deal but he made it a great deal by saying it doesn't have to be used one a month and there are no expiration date on them so i could get them all now or i could get them anytime. Well as i love them i decided to get me the years supply. (Just the years supply cards not actually get the 12 boxes that would just be greedy) So i spent a total of £40.99 on cookies today. lol. Then i walked away from the shop and thought of an amazing idea. I am going to get Millie's cookies for the wedding. at £35 for 144 cookies i think that is a great price. I was going to make my own but with getting the ingredient and making them then re-buying as i have eaten them all it would be cheaper to get these and i can put them on the candy table. MMMMMMMM.

12 share box plus my 12 gift cards in a nice little box.

our catch up

2011-03-08T16:40:00.000-08:00

I met up with my MOH on Saturday to bring her up to date with the bits and pieces that i have decided on. She had an op on her knee last week so her daddy dropped her off and we went to the pub for lunch which was amazing i will have to go there again, but anyway lol, i think it told her about everything and she LOVES!!!!! the idea of the candy buffet. I got to meet her new boyfriend too, and i must admit he is a lot better than the last one, i don't mean the last one wasn't a nice guy but looking back now it was like he was trying to get people to like like her was trying to hard but Scott seemed like a genuine guy but its still early days so we will see.

As it is the beginning of lent i have decided to take it serious this year, last year i managed it but i only went with the chocolate as it was something i thought i could do as there would be something i could substitute it with but this year i have decided that i am giving up bread and other yeast products, i know this will be a challenge for me as i think bread is a big part of my diet like a roll with my soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, so i am going to work hard and maybe this will keep my mind on track and i can concentrate on the prayers that's are needed. I'm sure with the help of my mom i will make it.

Its what month????!!!!!!

2011-03-01T06:20:00.000-08:00

I cant believe it is march already!!!!!! Just when the joint account is starting to look healthy money has to start coming out for deposits and buying things, i don't want to take the money out, lol. I need to wait till Thursday to see how much i am going to get paid this week as i have been working everyday since the 14th Feb and i want to know how much the tax man is going to take. I know what i am going to do, I'm going to sign on my online banking at just after midnight on Wednesday night and i should be able to see, so if you hear a funny noise it may be me, either screaming because I'm rich or calling someone all the scamming dirty asshole bitches under the sun.

Another plus point we are now the proud owners of a new (please read preloved) renault megane and i am insured to drive it too!!!! It turns out i almost halved the insurance by adding me to the policy so i think that entitles me to drive it don't you think.

Me and the MR sat down the other day and worked out prices for the wedding and how much we would have left over for extras and we decided we are going to hire suits as before we were worried we may just have to buy some cheap-ish suits but we worked it out and we should be ok, the only thing is it is the same price for 6 suits as it is for 5 (due to if you hire 5 the groom goes free) so we either need to think of another friend to wear one or get my grandad to wear one but i don't really want to ask him as he will take it as a hint and will pay for it and i don't want to sound like my sisters begging for money, its just not me, but we have time before we have to pay the deposits and sort it out so we should be ok. I also need to find more bowls and things for candies to go in as i only have the 4 vases at the moment, i like the thought of going to TKMaxx again as they had some good stuff on offer but i just cant be bothered to go all that way if they don't have anything, but then again i may be able to convince Dave to let me drive us there, we will see. Also we still don't know what to do about the photographer, when me and my mom went to the last wedding fayre we met this really nice guy who does it and he sounded really professional and all the pictures we looked at were really good with the posed ones and the candid shots but it costs £750 just for the cd package, which in our current situation could be used on something else but there isn't much of an alternative.

Im stealing again

2011-02-24T15:22:00.000-08:00

Not physically stealing but taking peoples quizes and things from their blogs, lol, im so bad but i suppose thats how it gets round so here it is.
26 things about me
1. Age: 23
2. Blog Title Inspiration: well its about my big day in the preperation stage so whats easier than calling it my big day in preperation, lol.
3. Chore You Hate: I hate drying up the dishes, i just hate it i dont know why.
4. Day at the Beach or Cozy Rainy Day? day at the beach but not if its too hot as i burn but i love the sand and walking along the waters edge really does do something to you.
5. Essential Start Your Day Item: My slippers, before i go to the toilet or let the dog out i have to get some comfy slippers.
6. Favorite Color: Purple
7. Gold or Silver? colour wise silver but metal wise it has to be gold as silver leaves me with a rash but i dont like the yellow gold colour.
8. Height: 5'7''
9. Instruments You Play: I can play the piano, double bass, drums and i have a violin but not really that into it any more the novelty has worn off.
10.Job Title: Machine operator
11. Kids: Im working on it
12. Live: Dudley in the west midlands which is the uk for people who didnt know.
13. Mom's Name: deb
14. Book Currently on Your Nightstand: Essential guide to IVF
15. Nicknames: Aim, or ame however you spell it its still like 'aim fire'
16. Overnight Hospital Stays? I fainted once at a boat festival, they were going to let me go home but as i had hit my head they kept me in just incase. Then I was in a car accident and was in for 2 days it was my miracle as i was paralysed from the waist down when it happened and i started getting the feeling back the next day. My mom knew how serious it was when they started drawing on my feet and poking them with a pin and i didnt flinch as i have the most sensitive feet ever, nomatter how deep a sleep i was in if someone touched my feet i would wake up.
17. Pet Peeve: Right now its the pregnant girl at work being treated like she is dissabled its rediculous, sometimes i have seen her ask people to get her a piece of card.
18. Quote from a Movie: Forrest Gump: 'momma said life was like a box of chocolate, you never know what you gonna get'. So true.
19. Right or Left Handed? Right.
20. Siblings: Biologically i have 2 sisters & 2 brothers but if i go on the ones i have seen and spoken to regular (or at all) in the past 2 years then i have 1 brother.
21. Time You Wake Up? As i work a twilight shift i dont have to get up early so i get up when the dog gets up or when i wake up, unless i am going somewhere then i get my mom to wake me up.
22. Underwear: Right now comfy briefs.
23. Vegetable You Dislike: Broccoli and thats only because of the texture the little nobbles on the flurettes just seem wrong.
24. What Makes You Run Late: forgetting something like brushing my teeth or breaking a hairband and having to find another one.
25. Yummy Food You Make: Philidelphia taglitelli with parma ham, chicken breast stuffed with cheese wrapped in parma ham.
26. Zoo, Favorite Animal: Penguins.
There 26 things about me, some were pretty random but oh well it took up some time.

Another day another......wedding fayre

2011-02-22T07:02:00.000-08:00

So, the hotel where we are having our reception held a fayre on Sunday so me and my mom went down for a look. My friends mom was there as she makes cakes and i got to see the cakes for real where i had only seen them on pictures before and i think i have pick one. I say i think i have picked one because i originally picked a different one from her which was a pile of suitcases with the bride and groom sat on the edge, but then i thought i wanted something taller so this is the one i am more than likely going to have.

We are thinking of having the tiers with the wiggly piping on to be lilac cake with white piping then maybe the plain ones just plain white, with purple decorations.

The best part is she is advertising this cake for people at £300 but as i am friends with her daughter since school she is going to let me have one for £200.....ding ding ding we have a winner lol. I know i may sound cheap sometimes but in our situation the more money we can save the better so by saving £100 on a cake is great. (My mom is paying for the cake but she said she was budgeting £350-£400 so i could have the extra!!!)

Then we saw something that would be so awesome to hire as a surprise for Dave, Random and Dave's, dad and here it is.

A replica A-Team van. It has lights and a TV inside and was actually quite comfortable. This was £190 for the hour then i think he said £40 each hour after that, but i thought they only really need it for the hour to get them to church. My brother was going to go in it but he is boring and said he wasn't going in it so that's fine by me.

While we were at the hotel i asked the coordinator about a few things, like the projector and we could use that for free as long as we sort out the laptop and slide show ourselves, There is no limitation on decorations as long as it doesn't require a permanent fixture and the menu has changed slightly. We now have a selection of food we would like to have instead of a set menu.

Soup.

Home-made Vegetable soup

finished with fresh cream and chopped herbs

Tomato, roasted red pepper and basil soup

sprinkled with green pesto croutons

Carrot and coriander soup

flavoured with a hint of orange

Roasted wild mushroom and tarragon soup

laced with cream

Leek and Potato soup

topped with croutons and snipped chives

Minestrone soup

with Parmesan croutons.

I am thinking either the vegetable, the leek and potato or the minestrone soup.

Main course.

Slow roasted belly of pork stuffed with apricot and sage stuffing

with cider gravy, honeyed parsnips, thyme carrots and roast potatoes

Japanese breaded turkey escalope

on slow roasted tomato and basil confit with a medley of roasted vegetables and potatoes

Chicken chasseur

a chicken breast smothered with a mushroom and white wine sauce

Seared Tuna

served with lemon and Parmesan spaghetti

or what we were offered before which was

turkey roast dinner.

I am still undecided if we will just stick with the turkey roast or go for something different but i know it wont be the chicken chasseur or the tuna.

Desserts.

Profiteroles

filled with vanilla cream and topped with chocolate sauce

strawberry cheesecake

with fresh cream

tropical fruit salad

or she also said if it was a chocolate fudge cake and ice cream we could have that because its not going to cost any more than the others to get.

Evening buffet.

I think we get a selection of 6 from the following,

Selection of filled sub rolls

Rosemary and lemon chicken drumsticks

Selection of assorted quiche slices

Puff pastry sausage rolls

Potato wedges

served with sour cream and chive dip

White fish goujons

served with tartare sauce

Vegetable spring rolls

with sweet chilli dip

Cheese and tomato pizza slices

Selection of Indian appetisers

with masala dip

Mini sausages wrapped in bacon

Breaded button mushrooms

with garlic mayonnaise dip

Crudities with a selection of dips

Tempura battered prawns

Out of these i will probably go with the, selection of filled sub rolls, Selection of assorted quiche slices, Puff pastry sausage rolls, Potato wedges, Mini sausages wrapped in bacon, crudities with dip and if i am able to i will add on the pizza slices. I am not really that bothered about having a lot to eat at that point in the day as i will be having my candy buffet which i asked about and she said it was OK to have that with chocolates, sweets cookies etc as long as its not anything that they could provide so i am have the all clear for that. I am going to bake some shortbread heart cookies and hopefully have them half dipped in dyed purple white chocolate and some plain with chocolate chips, then i found this article in the magazine for valentines day cookies that looked lie a cookie version of a jam tart but in a heart shape and they looked great so i will be testing these out.

I am still at a loss what i am going to do about the photographer. My mom is planning on having one of the new Olympus pen camera (or a better one if one comes out by then), And she said my brother could do the pictures but i might not get the quality of a professional and I'm never going to have a picture with everyone in them, but when we looked for photographer at the fayre they were charging so much money that its just not worth it. I don't think paying £1000 for a photographer to capture my day up to the reception and only have the photos on a disc and a small album is great value, i would like someone who is very budget conscious, where they know that they may not have different effects on them but that can be done by my brother or Dave who has experience with photo shop. I know i have to figure something out soon as they may be booked up is i wait but i still don't know what to do. We have Random who has a professional video camera which will be used by his brother probably for the church and around the rest of the day so that part is ok but i cant keep asking our friends to do everything for free.

My first work outing!!!

2011-02-15T05:11:00.000-08:00

I have been working at the same place for the last 4 years and this is the first time they have invited everyone out to a function, we went to the dogs, i had never been before so i was panicing about what to wear, but it was ok as the owners had put in place a dress code of no trainers and casual jeans so i thought that was the go ahead to dress up. For the past month i went out trying to find just the right thing to wear, as i was losing weight i tried skinny jeans and they fitted but then i lost a bit more weight and ended up in between sizes so they looked bad so i went on the look for something else, a dress maybe. I am not one for wearing dresses when i am around a lot of people as i feel i am being judged all the time but on the day of going out i found the hottest dress ever from dorothy perkins and after trying it on i knew it was the one, i knew it was highly unlikely that i would lose/gain that much weight in a matter of 5 hours that it wouldn't fit. So i went to the checkout and got the shock of my life, the dress was reduced to just £15!!!!!!! It really was my lucky day. so i got home hung up the dress so there were no creases and painted my nails, and curled my hair which took me little over an hour as i had to run up the road to tesco as i forgot to pick up some hairspray while in town.

We had VIP booth, free betting, open bar (hell yes), food and a whole lotta fun.

(just to get an idea of how much this must have cost in total, there were around 65 of us and we ran up a bar tab of just under £3000!!!! yes that was 3 thousand pounds. But like the owners said in a time when a lot of companies have had to close they were blessed enough to be swamped with work and in a position to let up drink and bet without putting our own hand in our own pockets so we were so grateful for their generosity)

All i can say is the dress along with some killer heels and a little hint of cleavage (maybe a little more than a hint lol) and my night was amazing, i will let the pictures do the talking....

Me and Rory

Me and Rory being rude, lol.

Janet, June, Me, Hayley, Mehmet and Jane.

Janet, June and Jane.

Julain, Stuart (one of the my glendennings - the owners) and Susan.

Janet, June, Jane, Mick, Hayley and Steph.

Nick

Paul and Ian.

Ian (with his naughty grin) and Me

Waqar

Me and Waqar

Mick and one of the receptionists.

Mick and Me

Me, Oscar (stuarts son and his designated driver) People off day shift who i don't quite know their names lol.

Day shift guy, Glen, Mick, Kim, me and Miles (the other owner and another glendenning)

Laura, Rory and Me

Laura and me

Rory and me, (he was very dunk and kept asking for pictures lol)

Me and Hayley mid grope while stuart glendenning took the picture, lol.

Rory and Hayley

Stuart and Hayley

Waqar, Hayley and Asif

Waqar and Hayley

Asif and Hayley

Hayley, Waqar, Me, Asif and My mom

Waqar, Me and Asif

Waqar and Glen

Me and Nice Ewa

The coach ride home.

Me and Hayley

I think it was a very good night all round apart from one of the older ladies being sick on the coach which was a little bit rank but i got some good feedback yesterday at work. And a few whistles lol.

My 2010

2011-02-11T17:33:00.000-08:00

I have just caught up with all the amazing blogs i read and there were 97 posts, it took a while. I love to read this blog which is one of the only uk wedding blogs i could find, today i read that she had read a list of questions all about their experiences in 2010 and so i decided to steal it too, thanks lou i also voted for you too by the way if you are reading this.

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?

In 2010 i took fertility drugs, they didnt work but i tried.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I decided in 2009 i wasnt going to make a resolution for 2010 and just go with whatever happens but for this year i decided i was going to make the most common one which is to lose weight which i have to do to be able to qualify for IVF so i think this one will be kept even if it does take a bit longer than i would like.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Nope, nobody i now that i am that close to did in 2010 which was a good thing as i was going through a bad year and would have probably flipped if they had.
4. Did anyone close to you die?

I wasnt that close to her but an awesome lady at work called glenis died just before the new year, early last year a girl bought in wine for her birthday and glenis had a few and we thought she had a lot more than that as she was very slurry and couldnt focus properly but she was joking about as eveyone thought she had just had one too many, on the monday she didnt come in to work, a few days later we heard she might have had a stroke, turns out she had 3 brain tumors. Her funeral was January and it was so beautiful.
5. What countries did you visit?

I didnt visit anywhere last year, I decided that i was going to pay off my debt as soon as i could so i didnt take a holiday.
6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?

A baby would be nice.
7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

3rd September because this was when i went to pick up my puppy mimi she was so small.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I know it isnt really an achievement for some but i managed to swallow pills which is something i have never been able to do.
9. What was your biggest failure?

Not being able to put myself in a good enough shape to beable to get pregnant
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Just my PCOS and infertility
11. What was the best thing you bought?

My wedding dress at a saving of over £700!!!!!!! And my dog..
12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?

Dave for standing by me through all of this infertility and having tests done.
13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?

i cant think of anyone right now.
14. Where did most of your money go?

Paying off my debt and buying wedding stuff.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

I got so excited about being debt free, i know that may not sound so exciting to some people but to be debt free for me is so surreal as i have been in debt since college.
16. What song will always remind you of 2010?

Bruno Mars - Billionaire
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
(a) happier or sadder? Happier

(b) thinner or fatter? Thinner

(c) richer or poorer? Richer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Gone out on day trips and out for drinks or lunch with friends.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Eat!!!!
20. How did you spend Christmas?

With the family playing games and eating....a lot...
21. Did you fall in love in 2010?

Yes i did....with Mimi
22. What was your favourite TV programme?

I am so into Disney channel so sonny with a chance and also four weddings.
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Ewa!!!!!!
24. What was your greatest musical discovey?

I have to agree with lou on this one it has to be Glee
25. What did you want and get?

I wanted to get my wedding dress and i got it at an awesome price too.
26. What did you want and not get?

A baby.
27. What was your favourite film of this year?

Harry potter, cant wait for part 2
28. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 23 and i went to go ape for my birthday.
29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

The fertility drugs to have worked so that i dont have to go through major treatment.
30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?

Plain, i dont remember much else than jeans and tops, other then shoes i remember lots of shoes lol
31. What kept you sane?

Knowing that i am going to have to start growing up if i am to go though such treatments so i had to work on who i am and what i really want.
32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Johnny Depp it is, has and always will be, he is just so munchable, lol.
33. What political issue stirred you the most?

That they were thinking of axing all government funded fertility treatment, but will still treat smokers, drinkers and fatties.
34. Who did you miss?

Dunno
35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010?

you really cant judge a book by its cover, just because someone looks fit and healthy that in reality they may not be and not everyone who has fertility treatment are older ladies who decided to have a career first, it can happen to young seemingly healthy couples.

Beter late than never..

2011-02-05T13:59:00.000-08:00

I was meant to post this last night but i never got round to do it as i had to stop the dog from barking every 2 seconds because the wind was making noises so here it is.

As i said yesterday i picked up some great bargains from TKMaxx yesterday and just had to show you what i got, I plan on using these as the main parts of my candy buffet, i will also be getting some other vases, jars and bowls from Ikea when i can but these were just such a great deal i couldn't not get them.

Please excuse the holes in the wall i tried to hang shelves but the wall plugs were just not playing along.

I am thinking if i can get about 12 different ones then fill them with different things it would look good, i might even place boxes under the table clothe so we have to variation in height but that is something i will sort out in a long time.

Don't you just love the shoes too, these are just one of my new pairs. I went searching Ikea the one day for a suitable shoe cupboard which didn't take up too much room but could hold a reasonable amount of shoes as i have a lot, lol. Well we have been invited to go to the dogs with the work next week and i think i have bought myself 4 new outfits and 2 new pairs of shoes, lol. Yes just for the one night, i am not very confidant in what i wear, i am always thinking people are judging me so i thought if i had a few to choose from then i might feel a bit more comfortable. My last buy was SKINNY jeans, i have never worn skinny jeans before, but i have lost weight and with heels it doesn't look too bad, i just need to find a top that isn't too tight to wear with it so that i don't look like a dodgy sandy from grease wannabe lol.

quick one

2011-02-04T07:22:00.000-08:00

Me and my mom were shopping today and in TKMax we found some awesone vases that we could use for the candy buffet so i picked out 4 in different sizes and styles thinking it was going to cost a bomb but they didnt i got all 4 for just under £22!!!!! I will post pictures later and a little bit about our problem we had yeterday tonight when i finish work but i was just so excited i needed to blog.

We have contact

2011-01-31T15:15:00.000-08:00

No not with aliens....with Amy....

She text me yesterday as the last message i sent her was saying i am thinking of going to go ape and did she and Chris want to come with, well she text me saying she was up for going but it would just be her as they broke up. She said they had grown apart and just were not getting on, so i decided that we should make it a girls day so she is texting Deb to see if the wants to come with us, it should be fun as the last time i went i didn't realise just how good it was going to be. It was tiring on the arms at parts but i loved is so i wanted to go again, and when i said to Amy before that we should go she said it would be awesome so we will take loads of pictures, we are not going till April though it might be warmer then lol.

Stressed much??

2011-01-28T06:53:00.000-08:00

After the week i have had i was hoping for a little bit of non stress time, even just a few days, but nope, work hasn't been too stressful just the usual drama over the fact that i have been allowed to do a higher roll for a few days while June isn't there (June sorts out break times and checks on everyone when we go in) when its normally another girl called Ewa that does it. No where in our contract does it say that just because you have stood in for someone before that you have a free pass to do it all the time, i just asked if i could do it on Fridays as it is overtime and June doesn't do overtime, i never said that i am doing it just so Ewa cant do it. She came in on Friday dressed up like to say i am boss i don't have to dress like you as i am doing Junes job, but then she found out she wasn't and i was. She had a face like thunder and gave me some proper attitude too (i am 23 she is like 30 so she should be a little bit more grown up than me. I also had to do this job again on Wednesday as June was not in again. I was told yesterday that i got a lot of good feedback about how good i did and people liked what i did and did i want to do it again on Friday, i just said if they want me to i will but if they had someone else in mind i didn't mind, which i don't, i go there knowing i have to do a job which ever job that is i am still there for 5 and half hours so we will see what i am doing today.

On top of work i still haven't heard from my MOH, i haven't seen her since September, i have messaged her loads of times and on facebook too but have heard nothing, it hasn't all been about weddings either i asked her if she and her boyfriend was up for go ape around Easter time but didn't hear anything. It really is starting to upset me a little because she was really excited and i had allowed her to be escorted by her own boyfriend. I wasn't making her buy her own dress or his suit i was getting it all so i don't understand. i have already started getting a few things like shoes and so if she doesn't get in touch i have a pair of shoes but no MOH. I don't think it is just a matter of picking someone else to do the job. I drifted away from a lot of my friends when i left school and being just one of 6 in our college class i am not ashamed to say i don't have many friends, but i don't have anyone really who can stand in for her, not just as my MOH but someone i can talk to about my fertility situation, she knew about the infertility and asked me to keep her updated but i have tried since finding out we will have to go for IVF but she hasn't got back to me so she doesn't know that and so she doesn't know we also god rejected either. I really don't know what to do. The wedding is already going to be more male dominant anyway by there being the groom, best man, my dad, my brother, my FFIL and my MOH's boyfriend if she comes compared to there being me, my brothers girlfriend and then my MOH if i had one, and even though my mom is my best friend she isn't one to want to be seen so she wouldn't really be counted as one of my ladies.

For someone who should be making their life as stress free as possible I'm not doing a very good job of it.

Not wedding related but i needed to share

2011-01-22T15:36:00.000-08:00

I got a phone call on Thursday from my GP saying they had a letter from the primary care trust saying we had been refused funding at this time for IVF because of my weight (i am still a few lbs over the criteria), I really don't know how to take it, i know i did slack off the diet over Christmas but who doesn't??? Am i really that bad that by being a few lbs over i am going to seriously harm any future children?? And if they are choosing if i can have treatment if i am too fat or not surely they should not allow other large ladies to have babies the natural way. Take for instance my SIL (my older brothers girth friend as i like to call her) This is no exaggeration but she must be at the least 24stone, She has managed to have 4 babies, she does nothing while my brother goes out to work and then when he comes back he cooks the dinner and cleans and more or less does everything, when i used to go to their house she would call him from another room to say she needed something when it was not too far from her. She was allowed to have her babies and i am at more then 10 stone less than her, yes i am more than one whole person smaller then her but i am categorised as being too big. It really does break my heart. I know i am only 23 and i know i am not married but neither of us have children, neither of us smoke, neither of us drink (only on the odd occasion like a party) and we have been trying for more than 3 and a half years. So i am trying so much harder with the weight watchers for the next few weeks then i have to go back to the doctors to be weighed again to make sure i am under a BMI of 30 then we can fill in the paperwork again. The paperwork took almost 2 months to get a decision so if i lose enough weight and fill in the forms by the end of February, we should get another answer by April. Here is hoping.

candy buffet

2011-01-17T06:53:00.000-08:00

I have been looking through a few wedding forums and there seem to be a lot of good feed back from candy buffets, i did want one but never knew if they would be popular or even if people would take any but after seeing that everyone had had success we have decided we are going to have one. We love sweets, all kinds and so does most of our families, and come on who doesn't like sweets, we will have soft sweets like harribo and other jellies but also bonbons, pear drops and mints. I am still looking to see what jars or bowls we are going to use but most people have had a variety so we will have a look at charity shops and ikea to see what we can get.

We also need to come up with a little poem to put on the table so here is a few little ideas, we may not use any of this and steal someone Else's but you never know.

Love is sweet,

Love is grand.

Welcome to our candy stand.

On a table,

Or a cart,

Check the tags to tell them apart.

Some for the old,

Some for the young.

Mix up the bag and you cant go wrong.

Take them all home,

Or eat them right here.

Watch out for the sour ones,

You may shed a tear.

Think of others,

We like to share,

Why not have a candy bear.

Now you've had your candy treat,

Get up on your dancing feet.

Wow that worked out better than i thought, We just have to make sure we get candy bears now. lol. Here is my list of sweets that i would like:

Parma Violets

Bonbons (different flavours)

Giant Strawberries

Gummy Bears

Sour Cherries

Pear Drops

Millions (different flavours)

Love Hearts (maybe personalised ones)

Gummy rings

Lolly pops

MMMMMM i feel like eating sweeties now lol.

THE coolest save the date in the WORLD....maybe....

2011-01-12T15:31:00.000-08:00

As i was getting up to date with my subscriptions i came across this one from met my match and i just had to share it.

Kate and Rich - 'Save the Date' (Wedding Invitation Film) from FX Films on Vimeo.

Wasn't that just the coolest thing you have ever seen, i laughed so much i had to watch it a second time. It got me thinking of what we were going to do (as we intended on just telling our family and sending little emails to our friends) and i though like less than 20 minutes ago, the MR qualified as a game designer so maybe we could make a little game for people to play that would give them the information before the invitation. I really haven't thought this through (as you can tell this will probably never work lol) but it would be awesome to do something like this or a video of some sort, a DVD game or something, i am so going to sleep on the idea and maybe look into it before i tell the MR and for him just to laugh in my face and send me to the local asylum lol. Any way i will let you know what i decided at some point.

What a bust

2011-01-11T07:02:00.000-08:00

The main word in the title was 'bust', as i said in a previous post i had ordered a new wedding dress, well i got a 14 and a 16, i got in the 14 but i couldn't get my boobs in, they could barely get in the 16, i looked a mess, well from the under bust up below looked great. So i will be sticking with my original dress, after my mom talked me into putting it on again and we thought we could use the spare hanging straps for the dress maker to fix the broken loop, then she will pay for it to be cleaned, if it makes me happy, i am happy but at the same time i feel like i am still going to look like i had a really big dress but scrimped on everything else.

Don't get me wrong i LOVE!!!!! my original dress and it was always me favourite from the moment the lady in the shop talked me into trying it on. Also, i got a veil a while ago, i wanted an elbow length one so i though i would look on eBay, there was one advertised as a 2 tier elbow length veil, when i got it it was a 3 tier and it is past fingertip length, it was also supposed to be ivory but it couldn't be more white if you bleached it. So this has put me off wearing a veil.

One good point it i have got a new curling wand and i can curl my hair quite easy, and it stays in all day!!! This has never happened before, i tried it out at our works Christmas party and that is in a hot factory so i though with the cold and wind outside and the heat inside i would end up with flat hair before anyone got there but it was still curly the next day!!

This one was at work.

This was late that night before i went to bed.

This one is around 5pm the next day (after i had a mole removed from my face, are you just loving my Nelly look lol.)

So i will now be having my hair curly for the wedding with my tiara and no veil. I am not sure how good the curls will be if my hair is longer but if i try it and it doesn't work as good or at all then i will cut my hair to the length it is now which is around my shoulders so i know how long it needs to be to get a good curl.

bridesmaid dresses came

2011-01-08T10:40:00.000-08:00

OK, yesterday the bridesmaid dresses came, as in my previous post i said i got the black one and a purple dip dyed one, well the dip dyed one just looked cheap, i tried them on and i wouldn't make my bridesmaids wear it at all, it made the boobs look so strange, and on Emma it was a little bit off the ground which i didn't want. The black one well what can i say about the black one other than.....I WANT ONE....I WANT ONE!!!!!!! it is amazing, its not thick like most bridesmaids dresses so it should make them sweat as much and they are very forgiving, they have this little split up the front of the top layer up to the boob line so it skims the curves beautifully and it came to the floor and didn't look too over the top or to revealing, i love it, i ordered a size 20 to try for Emma but she is losing weight so i think i will have to send them back then wait about 6/8 months to see whats going on then see about ordering it again, i have still not heard anything for my MOH so i will message her saying i have picked dresses that are black and hers may need to be taken up when i order it but if i don't hear anything then I'm not going to bother again, i will wait for her to get in touch. I ordered my dress which was a 16 but the date of delivery keeps going up it was at 14th jan now it is up to 25th jan so i looked and they had a 14 so i tried to order that, it says delivery on 11th jan which is Tuesday so we will see. i think a 14 may work as i could lose a few lbs if needed its not like i have to lose stones or anything so that's not a problem, the only worry is i am very top heavy so i will have to squish my boobies in to fit but i can always make them a bit flatter with a new bra so that's not a problem. When i told my mom she asked if i am going to change my mind again as i already got my other dress on her credit card and now i don't want it. I told her that it still is my dream dress and i would love to wear it but like how the one loop at the back snapped, what is to say all the others wont snap, it would just bother me, and i thought as i am not really going over board on other things and would like to save as much money as possible for any future fertility treatment that i don't want an over the top dress then for people to think i went and spent all my money on the dress and just got everything else on the cheap. I just think the new dress, should it fit, would be a bit more elegant but girly and more age appropriate, i want to look young as I'm not old, i think it is a very youthful dress. S me and my mom are going to see about putting my current dress back on eBay and just say i changed my mine, i am only human i am allowed to change my mind aint i???
We went to the flower warehouse today and i got 40 pull bows, 20 in cadbury purple and 20 in a shade lighter and they were really cheap too, about £3.50 a box with vat. They also have favour boxes in lilac a pack of 10 for £1.60 so about £10 for 6 packs.
I have been looking at the same site for the past year about the flowers and i think i am going to get my bouquets from them, for mine and 2 bridesmaids flowers its gonna cost about £55 which isn't too much. So far i think i have everything under control other than the MOH situation.

I will keep you posted when/if my dress arrives.

Im here

2011-01-05T16:42:00.000-08:00

I am here.... it feels like forever and a day since i last posted even though it was probably only a few days ago.

Well last year i got weird looks when i said i was getting married in 2012 like it was a million years away but now i can say i am getting married next year!!!!!!!!! I seems so close....

Well i was having a bit of a bored day today so i was searching the net for everything and anything. I came across a few dresses that would be suitable for my bridesmaids but i need to see if they would be long enough for Emma as she is quite tall so i would order a few to see. this was the original one i was going to order.

This dress was for £89 and does not come with the blue stole but a purple one, but when i decided to order one that's when they decided the biggest they had was in a 14 and that would be too small so i had to give up on that one.

Then i found this one which i cant remember how much it was but it was about the same price maybe a little bit cheaper.

I ordered this one in black but the picture was a bit dark so here it is but in blue, it looks so pretty and hopefully it is long enough.

I also ordered this one too which i thought was awesome.

They are not from a bridesmaid shop or anything so i can send them back but i think i like this one because its just lighter and fresher looking.

Then as i was looking i fell in love, now i know i have said my dress is my dream dress, there are so many things about it that are just irritating me about it like having to have the lace hook fixed then there is no guarantee that the others would not break and it needs to be cleaned and i just have fell out of love with it. but i found this one that i think would work with the fact that i have found a hair style that is quite low maintenance and so this dress is a bit simpler and it was on sale for £150!!!!!!!!!! i thought my dress was a bargain but this one is brand new and this cheap how could i not order it, and it was the last one in a size 16 too. So without making you wait any longer here it is.

As we have been having fertility issues my body shape is most likely to change in the next 20 months and i think this dress will suit any shape and if it just so happened that i am in the situation where i am with child (i know not a perfect situation but it will hide it well and it will all be worth it.

The bridesmaids dresses should be coming this Friday and the wedding dress the following Friday. I cant wait.

Now a little moan. My MOH started uni this past September and so i understand that she will be busy but since then i have messaged numerous times by phone and on facebook and have not heard anything from her even though i know she wasn't always busy over Christmas. I don't know what to think, could it be she doesn't want anything to do with it any more. i cant think of a reason why she wouldn't at least message me saying hi and that she is really busy with uni but i got nothing. I have not ordered her a dress yet as they are mostly just to see if they are long enough for Emma but if she doesn't get in touch then I'm not gonna get a dress as it is a lot of money to spend if she wont be needing it. if she does then she may have to have a different dress and deal with it. What am i supposed to do???????

wow!!!!

2010-12-28T12:00:00.000-08:00

I am so surprised at some peoples comments lately. I have decided that in January i am going to get Mimi 'done' she is just 6 months and having seasons, can open her up to all sorts of problems, and as she is so small there is no way i would breed her, i think this would just put too much pressure on her and myself as i don't think i could deal with a litter, and if anything was to happen to her i would hate myself so it is just the best option. Now on to the comments, someone who knows about my IF, heard that i was going to get Mimi done and said i should be a little bit more sympathetic as i know what its like not to be able to have children why should i put my dog through that........erm hello, she is my baby, she is so small and she depends on me, I'm not going to put her at risk of death just so that i can make money from her, there is a bit of a difference between me having a child and allowing my dog to have a litter. Just because of my IF i have not chosen to do this, i would hate myself if i let her keep her womb then get cancer, or i end up with a litter or puppies but she was so ill i had to put her down or she died, she cannot be replaced. Would you ask a parent to put their child in that situation, i think not. Its like not letting my child have their injections when they are born, it is to prevent suffering, not just to give them some pain.

OK rant over.....

christmas chocolates mmmm

2010-12-24T06:35:00.000-08:00

I went out to pick up the last few things before the shops close for Christmas and i came across these beautiful chocolates i just had to get some. They are Irish cupcake chocolates and the cutest things i have ever seen, they don't taste too bad either, lol.

You will see one empty hole, that's because my mom couldn't wait for me to take a picture before devouring one, lol.

Merry Christmas everyone!!!!

Day 30 – A photograph of youself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days

2010-12-23T15:58:00.000-08:00

Day 30 – A photograph of yourself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days

I don't have a picture from today as i have been really busy with shopping and the vets and making sure everything is ready for but i will re post a couple from the last few days.

The first one was from Tuesday night and the second one was from yesterday after my surgery.

The 3 good things that have happened in the last 30 days are:

1. I broke up from work for the Christmas holidays.
2. I got some amazing compliments at work about my outfit for the last day at work.
3. I have been able to teach Mimi to lie down (finally) and to push open the back door after toilet and push it closed after she is done.

Day 26, 27, 28 and 29

2010-12-22T13:31:00.000-08:00

Sorry i haven't posted for my blog challenge for a few days i have been really busy, yesterday i finished work for the Christmas holidays and me and my mom were asked to do the food for the party so we have been so bust shopping and cooking over the past few days i have bearly had time to read eveyones posts but i managed it, the food was awesome, here is me yesterday:

As i have written before i love Christmas and i love dressing up so whats better than to dress up at Christmas. I was also shocked that my hair stayed curly, i normally spend like an hour on curling then as soon as i head out its gone flat so i was surprised.
I had to have a mole removed from my face today and i look like Nelly i have this plaster across my cheek but it is quite tender though.

Below there are 2 pictures where you can see the mole on my right cheek (on the left of the pictures)

I was told there didn't look like a problem with the mole but it had grown a bit and when i look down i could see it so i thought i will see if the doc will take it off (along with one on my back which had a skin tag in it). So i went today and she injected my face and it went numb almost straight away, the only think is i could feel what she was doing, not in a painful way but the sensation was making me a little woozy, i could feel her 'scooping' out the mole, it was one of the weirdest feeling ever. and now for the next few days i have to go around looking like this:

Now for the 4 days of challenges.

Day 26 – Someone you admire.

I admire Emma Watson, Hermionie Grainger from Harry potter, i know this one sounds strange but never once have i heard that she has been a diva or thinks she is better than anyone because she is famous, it was only recently that she said how shocked she was when she realised just how much money she has. She also goes to uni in America like any other normal girl. Such an inspiration.

Day 27 – A picture of you last year and now and how have you changed since then?

This was at my baptism in march 2009, since then i have changes in that i no longer attend church. I am and always will be a christian but last Christmas i was accused of stealing the one of our pastors tops from the ironing shop where i used to volunteer every Thursday morning and the odd day when someone else couldn't do it. I couldn't believe it, they were always gossiping about people who had left the church for whatever reason, and the day the top went missing i left with a tiny little gift bag that was about 2 inch by 4 inch which had a little gift from the pastor for my help in the shop, so where was i supposed to have put this top, i am not even the same shape or size as her. I just thought this was not on, for a while i was having texts asking if i had seen it as it was missing then that it was expensive and i will admit i did iron it, but i was hanging in that shop when i left. So that is how i have changed from this picture.

Day 28 – Your favourite movie.
I have so many movies that are my favourite that i don't know what to put, but i will say that some of the movies i can watch over and over again are the bring it on movies. I saw the first one while i was a cheerleader and i loved it.

Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.
I could never get tired of watching Disney, it doesn't bother me if it is movies or shows i love Disney, i don't think i will ever grow out of it.

Sorry about the picture over load, i think i got a little carried away.

Day 25 – Your Favourite Colour

2010-12-18T02:55:00.000-08:00

My favourite colour is purple, and pink. Pink used to be my favourite but then it started to get very popular for chavs, i mean head to toe in pink tracksuits and their kids the same so i cut back on the pink. But purple is like totally awesome, that's why my colour scheme for the wedding is purple. For your viewing pleasure here are a few picks of my purple bits and pieces.

Day 24 – A photo of something that means a lot to you.

2010-12-17T10:15:00.000-08:00

This means such a lot to me, this is me and my mom, she hates having her picture taken, lol. My mom is my best friend, i know people say their mom is their best friend but they have another best friend, well no, me and my mom do so much together its unreal, we used to go to the gym together like 5 times a week, we go shopping every week together, we even work together, if i have a problem my mom is there, if she has a problem i am there, the only thing is when i move out i will miss my mom so much even though i will be seeing her almost everyday for work.

Day 23 – Your Skincare Regime.

2010-12-16T15:15:00.000-08:00

I have never really been effected by spots until these last few years with stress but even then there are only a few and nothing really major so when i was in college i would only uses wipes on my face unless i was having a facial then i would have the lot, cleanse tone and moisturise, now i sometimes use moisturiser before i put my make-up on but as i don't wear it every day i just stick to a bit of Johnson's baby lotion and sun cream if I'm gonna be outside a lot.

Day 22 – A photo of you as a child.

2010-12-15T06:08:00.000-08:00

This was me when i was about 4 or 5, i loved having my picture taken so i have a million pictures that i could put on here but i dont think my scanner would cooperate for that long, lol.

Day 21 – Something you crave a lot.

2010-12-14T05:21:00.001-08:00

Something i crave a lot, well lately anyway, is a burger. Preferably a Burger king XL bacon double cheese burger. Apart from my recent gorge i have been quite good with the diet but at work last night i was so hungry all i could think about it one of these burgers, and a plus point is Merry hill shopping centre is open till midnight up till Christmas so i could have got one when i finished work at 10 but i didn't i went home and had me a small pizza baguette. So here for your satisfaction is a picture of THE burger.

Day 18 – The meaning behind your blog name, Day 19 – Another picture of yourself and Day 20 – A photo of something that makes you happy.

2010-12-13T06:37:00.000-08:00

Day 18 – The meaning behind your blog name.

The meaning of my blog name is that this is about my preparation for my big day with a few other bits in there too.
Day 19 – Another picture of yourself.

This is my new outfit for work next week, i love dressing up.
Day 20 – A photo of something that makes you happy.

I love to see a winter sunset, this one was taken while on my way to work last week, i had to catch it as we were driving down a hill, some days there were better views but you have to catch it just right before the sun dips below the hills.

Day 17 – 10 Things I Want To Do Before I Die

2010-12-10T07:51:00.000-08:00

1. Go to Australia....Mate.
2. Be a mom.
3. Climb more mountains, and be able to see the view from the top.
4. Study forensics
5. Enter Mimi into crufts (may never happen but you never know)
6. I want to have posted over 2000 blog entries
7. I want to swim with the dolphins
8. I want to decorate my own house for Christmas, including the outside
9. Live completely debt free for at least a year (not including mobile phone contracts)
10. Perform on stage.

Day 15 – Something you don’t leave the house without. and Day 16 – What’s in your bag?

2010-12-09T06:13:00.001-08:00

I thought i would do both of these together as i never leave house without a few things that are in my bag.
First i never leave the house without lip balm, at the moment it is a fanta orange flavour and it keeps your lips so lush i am gonna stock load it just in case.

Second, i never leave the house without my phone, its not only my phone anymore, it is where i keep track of my appointments and results and my little notes and questions to ask different people at different places.

I have just today emptied my bag out so in there now i have, tissues (both for my nose and for doggy poop), my purse, perfume, deodorant, mouthwash, face cream, phone, 3 lolly pops, and lip balm.

Day 14 – A TV show you’re currently addicted to.

2010-12-07T04:26:00.000-08:00

This one would have to be misfits. I have never laughed so much than when i watch this. If you haven't seen it or missed the first season, it is about this group of young people on community service and then they all realise they have special powers, they get into all kinds of trouble. Its definitely one to watch.

Day 12 – 15 Random Facts about you. and Day 13 – Your favorite musician and why?

2010-12-06T06:10:00.000-08:00

Day 12 – 15 Random Facts about you.

1. I check facebook daily.

2. I wear shoes in 3 different sizes, 6, 7 and 8.

3. I did beauty therapy at college but i don't have time to paint my nails and when i do i can chip them in minutes.

4. I sometimes can go almost a week without washing my hair. (i know this is rank but if i wash too much with the wrong shampoo it looks like an Afro)

5. I took a course when i was near the end of school and the beginning of college to build a computer and i made a computer powered robotic arm.

6. The only alcohol i drink is in cocktails.

7. I have always had a feeling from when i was a little girl that i would have twins or triplets, my nan was pregnant with twins just after my dad was born but she sadly lost them.

8. I am always the one in the household (we have 2 men in the house, my dad and my brother) and i am the one who has to deal with the fixing of the Internet and the sky.

9. I am ~~not~~ addicted to Pepsi Max.

10. The only time i have a cup of tea is to dip biscuits in so i only have a half cup.

11. I enjoy drawing, but only when i have the feeling, if i was asked to draw something but wasn't in the mood of didn't get the feeling i couldn't do it.

12. I gave my dog dryer balls to play with.

13. One of my lucky numbers is 13, the other is 7.

14. I doubted weight watchers for so long but now i realise that it is actually working.

15. I have weird feet, they are fat in some places but bony in others and they are hairy too (sorry but that is what PCOS does to you)

Day 13 – Your favorite musician and why?

My favourite musician changes quite often but at the moment my favourite is Demi Levato she is awesome, her songs are so real and they are so easy to relate to.

Day 11 – What’s in your makeup bag?

2010-12-04T04:27:00.000-08:00

well as of this morning my make-up bag is mostly empty as i had to tip it all out to find what i needed so i will just run through a list of what is in there maybe with some pictures if i can find them on google.

First we have my Bourjois bio detox organic foundation, this brand is one of the only ones that goes pale enough for me and it isn't to thick.

Then we have Lancome matte finish powder.

Then we have Rimmel max mascara, i get different mascara every time as i am yet to find one that is perfect this one is good but a little bit clumpy sometimes.

I have an eye liner that i have no idea what brand it is but this is the closest picture i could find, it has a bud on the end for application and there is a lid that goes with it that has a hidden sharpener in it.

Then there is clarins 3 in one blush, and tint, it can be used on cheeks lips and even eyes, it is awesome.

I have a few different of these Barry M dazzle dusts, in blue, silver and pail pinks. Not that i know where all of them are, lol.

I have a few of these too, they are from Avon, and i have the black and grey, a pink and purple and i think a blue one.

Obviously i have to have a whole group of make-up brushes from the Sporty range.

And last but definitely not the least important is the good old Johnson's baby lotion. I love the smell and how soft it leaves your skin, i cant wait till i have a baby so that my house can smell of this all the time.

Day 10 – A photo of our favorite place to eat.

2010-12-03T08:50:00.001-08:00

This one is a little bit of a fail as i don't have a picture or can i find a picture of it but my favourite place to eat (or take home and eat) is Top1 pizza, their pizza is the best pizza in the world, i love pizza hut and domino's but this is so much better, they do stuffed crust but not just with cheese they do it with pepperoni in the crust too, it really is awesome.

Day 9 – A photo of the item you last purchased.

2010-12-02T04:33:00.000-08:00

I went shopping today as a new Iceland has opened so we decided to stock up for Christmas, then we went to aldi as they had a chidurky, dickrky, turducken or what ever they are called these days lol well a 3 bird roast for Christmas dinner so we went there and i found the cutest pair of wellies i just had to get them so here they are.

Arnt they just the cutest things ever??????

Here is a picture i took today, Mimi has been a little off her food with a gurgling belly yesterday so i thought she was sick but she seems to have all her energy and has eaten her breakfast today so i let her out in the garden again in the snow and this picture is just so cute.

That was supposed to be my workout trampoline, but the dog loves it so we left it out for her.

Day 7 – Your dream wedding. And Day 8 – A song to match your mood.

2010-12-01T05:42:00.001-08:00

Day 7 – Your dream wedding.

http://mybigdayinprep.blogspot.com/

This is my blog where my dream wedding is coming true.

Day 8 – A song to match your mood.

I am still fuming from something that happened yeasterday and i had a comment on facebook too that i will post just as a back up before she deletes it

Here it is mainly that part about i hate you so much right now, not the rest of the song. This is the reason for that.

this is the conversation that happened on facebook. If its not deleted by the time you read it.

Day 3, Day 4, Day 5 and Day 6

2010-11-29T06:33:00.000-08:00

I haven't been here for the last few days i have been quite busy having new fence in the garden and sorting out Christmas decorations so here is a big post today for my challenge.
Day 3 – Your idea of the perfect first date.
My idea of the perfect first date would be something like a picnic so that its not too formal and not too loud so you can get to know each other then end with him walking you home with a single kiss, aawwwwww.

Day 4 – Your favorite photograph of your best friend.

This is Amy, i love this picture.
Day 5 – A photo of yourself two years ago.

This was taken January 2008 so its nearly 3 years ago but when we had a photo shoot, that was a fun day.
Day 6 – A photo of an animal you’d love to keep as a pet.

I have posted this picture before but i thought i would use it again, i love penguins i would love to have one, I'm sure its cold here in the winter for one as the temperature recently has gone to around -2 centigrade which is cold.

On another note, i had an appointment today about the mole I'm gonna have removed, we thought it was to have it off today but it wasn't, so we went all that way just so that she could say it didn't look like there was anything wrong with it and if i knew having it off would leave a scar?? EERRRRRMMMM hello I'm not stupid and its not like I'm a super model or anything how will a scar be any different to the mole anyway. so i have to go back on the 22nd December to have it taken off then i don't have to go to work as i break up for Christmas the day before.
On another note, again, i went back to weight watchers this morning and was crapping myself, i had a huge binge yesterday, i didn't even want to work out my points, i had an OK brunch (i took the dog out so wasn't back until half 11 so had brunch instead of breakfast) then my dinner was not too bad apart from i had some roasted potatoes in oil, then in the afternoon i couldn't stop i ate 2/3 of a pack of biscuits, 2/3 of a tube of pringles, a slice of pizza, a packet of crisps and a weight watchers chocolate dessert. So i get to the front of the queue to be weighed and i am so nervous i felt like being in school again where i was gonna be told off, but it turns out i still lost 1 and half pounds this week, which was pretty good to say i binged.

4 Things.

2010-11-25T07:26:00.000-08:00

Today i was catching up on a few blogs and came across this little thing that someone was doing, it was 4 Things then you have to answer them so i thought to pass the time before i go to work i would do them. Here goes.

4 Things I did 10 Years Ago (2000):

I started secondary school.
I moved into my current house.
I dyed my hair for the first time.
I lost one of my best friends.

4 Things I did 5 Years Ago (2005):

I had just started my second year at college.
I lost a lot of weight on diet pills.
I fell so deep into depression, i was on medication and was concidering the unthinkable.
I got my first job at the showcase cinemas and it was awesome.

4 Things I did Yesterday:

Decided that i was going to put christmas lights on the outside of the house.
Decided Friday is christmas shopping day.
Had a headache.
Went to work.

4 Shows I love to watch:

19 Kids and counting (it hasnt got to 19 kids and counting over here yet but i have seen it in advance)
Hannan Montana forever even though i am an adult i still made sure i stopped what i was doing when the hour long special came on to so how she told everyone that she was miley, on the leno show too, it was awesome and i loved the one where she sang the song for the families of army men and women, it bought a tear to my eye.
Teen mom, i know it sounds sad but i do enjoy the drama.
Sister wives, i dont believe in polygammy but who am i to say other people shouldnt do it, it is quite and eye opening program.

4 things I love to do:

Read, i have always loved to read, i will read almost anything, and i must say when i am in the book store i do judge a book by its cover, that is sometimes how i pick my next read, it doesnt always work out but it is still a way of picking.
Shopping, i think this one is a little bit predictable.
Walk my dog.
Play on the Wii.

I just had to share Day 2 - a picture of something you ate today.

2010-11-25T06:59:00.000-08:00

UPDATED!!!! I didnt actually realise that todays challenge was something i ate today until i just looked so it was quite a good thing i had a yummy lunch today, lol.

Well i actually got into my weight watchers book and looked at what real food i can eat apart from rabbit food and so i came up with a rather yummy lunch today, i had
steamed chicken breast = 4 points

oven chips = 5 points

side salad with half portion of cheese = 2 points

bbq sauce = 1 points

fruit juice = 2 points

Total was 14 points which as my main meal of the day was awesome i think, just take a look.

That was one tasty lunch. I am left with 12 points for today and that will be about a 3 point snack and a cup-a-soup for 1 point, the last 2 days i havnt had all my points, i dont know if this is going to make a difference but i cant see how eating more is going to help.

Day 1 – A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.

2010-11-24T15:06:00.000-08:00

My day today didn't quite start as it usually does, normally i am woken up by Mimi jumping at the side of the bed but i woke up this morning quite late and she was still asleep. Obviously when i started moving she got up too. I got up fed her then let her outside. I then got ready to go out to tesco to get something for my dinner, i didn't know what i wanted at this point, so off me and my mom went on the short walk to tesco, i ended up buying a multi pack.....no not of biscuits but of magazines, a pack of grapes and a cabbage, see i love cabbage, if it wasn't for my love of cheese and Italian food i would be so healthy as i love most veg, so i decided i was going to have cabbage with chicken and a sprinkle of cheese for my dinner that should have come to around 10 points. When i got to the checkout i was served buy the guy who always had to pet Mimi when i took her in when she was so tiny, he asked where she was today and i told him that i didn't want to bring her as we were told to leave the main store before so i didn't want her to be banned from the other shops too, he said i should argue that there are no signs up about not taking the dog in, plus she was always carried anyway so where is the problem?? Anyway, i went home and made my dinner, and started to design the writing for my Christmas card to Ruth and David from the US, by designing the writing i mean, my mom has a machine that can cut out and draw things so i went online to pick a Christmas font and tried a few out and finally finished it, all i need to do now is stick it down then fill it out, pop the gift i got her in the envelope and send it off. Well then i caught up with the blogs i follow then had to get ready for work, at this point i could feel a headache coming on, so i had to suffer at work with one of those niggly headaches that is right at the front above your eyes, well then i came back and decided i wanted a fish finger sandwich, but yes you guessed it we had no fish fingers, so i ended up cooking a coated fish portion then mashing it onto a sandwich and you know what?? it tasted awesome!!!! I could just eat another, but i wont as i am on my weight watchers.

Day 30 - a picture

2010-11-23T05:36:00.000-08:00

Here we are again at the end of another 30 day challenge, but dont worry i will be starting a new one tomorrow, well infact it is 2, i found a new one plus a photo one so i will be linking them both together.

Day 30 - a picture, i thought i would put something on here today that i found which really put a smile on my face, its a few pictures i found one day when i was looking for a pick me up and these really did the trick i hope you like them.

Thanks for following.

Day 28-Something that stresses you out and Day 29-3 Wishes

2010-11-22T17:29:00.001-08:00

Day 28 - something that stresses you out. I think this is pretty obvious, what stresses me out so much is the fact that my body isn't the same as someone else my age, i mean, i don't want to be like the same but you always hear people say your young you have your health and nothing to worry about infertility is something that happens when you leave having children too late, but in my case even if i was 'old' at the ripe old age of 23 then when would have been my time, 10 12 14 years????? this is so stressing and to make it a little bit more stressing i still have to lose weight before getting the IVF, i went for the first meeting for weight watchers this morning and so tomorrow i start the diet, i am just hoping i lose at least 8 lbs by then. all these things are what is stressing me out.

Day 29 - 3 wishes, wish 1- i wish my body would just work the way it should, wish 2 - that Ruth could get her wish of a healthy baby, i know i don't know her but what i do know of her she is so deserving. wish 3 - i wish for my mom not to hurt so much about not seeing her grand kids.

Day 27-Pets

2010-11-20T13:49:00.000-08:00

Since i have been old enough to buy and look after my own animals i have had a few so i didn't really want to leave any of them out so i am gonna give them all a little recognition.

My first pet was a hamster called Dora. She died of old age.

Then we have Dora, yes that's right i had 2 hamsters called Dora because when i had mine my sister got my niece one but then didn't want to look after it so i had it. She died of wet tail.

Then i had 2 little hamsters that the store said could be placed together but the one killed the other one. First we have Bella who was killed by fizz.

Then fizz, who dies of old age.

Then i had a rabbit called bob who is still with us at the ripe old age of 3 ish.

Then i had a tiny little Russian hamster the was originally called Zena but after being able to escape her glass tank then a sealed plastic cage i changed her name to Lil h (h for Houdini) but she dies last month i presume of old age. She was that small she is actually next to a loo roll tube in the picture.

For the past about 4 years we have also had 2 other animals that i didn't buy but i am the one who has housed them in my room when needed, feed them and water them and clean them out and these are chip and monk, our 2 chipmonks, my dad got these from a guy at work who had to get rid of them, they did have names but we couldn't remember them so i just called them chip and monk. first is chip then monk. we still have these.

Then you gotta save the best till last, my little baby Mimi, my king Charles spaniel. Check out her own little page at the top for all the up to date info and pics.

Day 25-Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs and Day 26-Picture of your family

2010-11-19T10:33:00.000-08:00

Day 25-Put your ipod on shuffle, first 10 songs. (i dont have an ipod i have a Zen player)
1. BEP - I got a feelin'
2. Anastasia - One day in your life
3. Green Day - American idiot
4. Hillsong - Hosana
5. Taylor Swift - Thug story
6. Taylor Swift - Best day
7. Tenacious D - City hall
8. Elton John - Your song
9. Miley Cyrus - Simple song
10. Gwen Stefani - Long way to go

That is a great mix.
Day 26-Picture of your family.
I dont have a picture of all my family together so i will put my little family on here.

This is my little family so far, me Dave and my 'baby' Mimi.

Day 24 -something you have learned

2010-11-17T16:22:00.000-08:00

I have learned a few things in the past few weeks that i don't know where to start, i will put a few things into bullet points for you.

I have learned that some Muslims believe that when they die they turn into trees. I thought this was amazing i had never heard this before.
I have learned the difference between procreate and procrastinate.
I have learned that since finding out that its not just female factor infertility that is effecting us but also male factor too it has bought it closer than ever.

Day 23 - your favourite vacation

2010-11-16T06:27:00.000-08:00

This one is easy our trip to Orlando Florida 2008. Me and dave decided we were gonna go and visit all the parks and it would be awesome, one problem i had never been on a plane and the flight was 8 hours from UK to USA would this really be a good idea???? Well it would have to be so we booked well in advance as it was so much money but it was totally worth it. Apart from losing around $500 (dont ask) and getting so burnt we had to sleep in separate beds lol. The Thomas Cook rep said the heat and sun was different out there and i wouldnt need my factor 50 suncream, she suggested this natural factor 25, i got some and popped it on and away we went, 3 days in we decided to go to the aquatica waterpark, which as the time was awesome, apart from the money situation and when we were getting ready to go and realised the suncream hadnt worked even though it was waterproof and reapplied. Other than that everything else was amazing.

This was from the balcony early in the morning, amazing weather.

This was the day before said aquatica trip with just a little reddening of the sholders. mmmmm turkey leg, lol.

I cant believe how big i was back then i am disgusted with myself.

I loved the dolphins, when we go again i am gonna swim with them.

Almost the same as the Paris one just bigger i think.

Again great weather but you can see the burn around my sholders.

And where my swimsuit came to.

This was a week and half after the burning and a few days before we came home and you can still see the burn, it was so painful it was turning purple and yellow, eeeewwwww.

100th post-aversary!!!!!!!! and Day 22 -favourite city.

2010-11-15T05:23:00.000-08:00

Today is my 100th post-aversary, i never thought i would have blogged so much i thought i would have tried about a week then given up but then again most of it is probably my different 30 day challenges but that is what they are their for to get you to blog everyday (or every other day sometimes).

Day 22 -favourite city.

This one was hard to choose as i have a few to pick from but its going to have to be...........

Paris!

We went to France 3 years ago and had the day in Paris and it was awesome. We went to the Louvre and saw all the bits from the Da'Vinci Code.

Then we went to Disneyland on another day it was so much fun.

I want to go back again maybe for a hen weekend with my mom and maids if they can afford it and i want to go to the Moulin Rouge.

Day 21-a photo of you

2010-11-14T06:31:00.000-08:00

Well today we went on a walk with the dog to Clent, at the top of the hill from some of the views it looked like we were really high because of the mist but its not really that high. Here is the picture of me, i decided i will use a photo i took Friday after i had been shopping and got me a new babyliss curling wand, and my hair stayed curly for the rest of the day, it never does that so here it is.

Here are the pictures that i took today, if you look at the view sometimes it looks like the sea is close but really it is just the fields and mist.

Here is Mimi enjoying her walk.

Me and Dave with Mimi as she wouldn't cooperate with the camera so i had to hold her.

My mom and dad with Mimi

See it looks like the sea.

Me and my mom.

And me and Dave with me showing how breezy it was up there.

Day 20-nicknames

2010-11-13T05:27:00.001-08:00

I don't really have any nicknames apart from aim but that's about it, when i was in school there was a guy who thought he was funny and i got called chocolate cherry head all because i had dyed my hair and they over heard me tell my friend what the colour was so that stuck until i started being called kitkat chunky because i would have one a week at school, i never ate one since.

Day 19- something you miss

2010-11-12T13:39:00.000-08:00

I know this is going to sound a little bit cliche but i miss being younger, when you have the freedom to feel like an adult but with out the resposibilities. I miss being that teenager that always dreamed of having a big family with lots of kids in which i would be able to conceive more or less when i wanted to, to be like other people that only seem to think about being pregnant and it happens. I miss the time when i was naive and thought that if i forgot to put my patch on at the right time i would be one of those girls people expected me to turn out as. But most of all i miss the time that i was part of a couple who didn't know we had fertility problems and just thought it wasn't our time for a baby, the time when all i needed to worry about is what colour my bridesmaids are going to wear and and what my hair will look like and what i want my flowers to be like, not like now when i feel like i have to deal with work, and planning a wedding and trying to lose weight and work out when we will get our turn, its like living in limbo, not knowing when anything is going to start to happen if at all.

Day 17-something you're looking forward to and Day 18-something you regret

2010-11-11T05:46:00.001-08:00

Day 17-something you're looking forward to, i am so looking forward to getting this ivf journey on the road, i am trying my best to stay positive and most of the time i succeed, i am also looking forward to harry potter next week, lol i know i know but i am an undercover nerd and i love all the movies, i was just a little bit disappointed with the 6th movie as there was supposed to be a big battle when dumbledore dies but there wasn't so i am hoping the last 2 are epic, i cant believe i just said epic on my blog, i am such a nerd lol.

Day 18-something you regret, i don't really regret a lot in my life as it has gotten me to where i am now but there is one thing that i do regret and that is wasting my time on people that have no respect for anybody other than themselves.

Day 16-your dream home

2010-11-09T05:03:00.000-08:00

I have posted this before on my previous 30 day challenge, here, this will always be my dream home, it has been since i first saw a house like this on an american show when i was younger, it always had a happly little family with a dog or 2 in the yard.

Day 13-Goals, Day 14-A picture you love, Day 15-Bible verse

2010-11-08T06:44:00.000-08:00

Day 13-goals, i do have many goals but i will just put my main goals on here, my first would be to get my BMI down to around 27 before our IVF appointment which i still dont know when it will be. Then to make sure i do all i can to make sure our first and only funded attemt is given the best chance including acupuncture and relaxation. Then to get on with some wedding planning, as at the moment i dont really have much done, but then again i do have a while so i am ok for now. These are my top goals at the moment.

Day 14-a picture you love,

I love this picture, i have posted about this before but i cant help it, it looks like we had been to the far east but really we were in animal kingdom, florida, i lived it there even though when this was taken we were in a queue for a river rapids ride for 80 minutes!!!! i know that is so long but what else did we have to do and there was so much to take pictures of it went really fast.

Day 15-a bible verse, There are a few verses that i like from Matthew the first is Matthew 6:19-21 the second is Matthew 6:26

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

"For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul?"

Both of these verses are so strong to me as someone said to me, " i have a car, a house, a wife and kids and what do you have nothing." Fast forward less than a year and this same person has to sell their car, they are separated from their wife and their kids were actually their wives kids so they have lost them too and they have to move out as the house was also their wives. While i have the love of my god, my partner, my parents, the respect of these and my self worth, this is how i knew i was more wealthy than this person as i may not have a car or a house or kids but when i leave this life i will know that i have given all i can in love, respect and time.

Day 11-favourite tv show and Day 12-what you believe.

2010-11-05T13:22:00.000-07:00

Day 11-favourite tv show.

At the moment i would say my favourite tv shows at the moment are:

18/19 kids and counting, i love this show so much i was a little impatient with waiting for us to get the up to date episodes over here so i watched them on the internet, i love just how together this family is and their beliefs are so strong. I love them.

Hannah montana forever, I am a big kid at heart and i love this show, there are not many episodes left but it could watch them over and over.

Wizards of waverly place, as above i love disney shows.

Day 12-what you believe.
I am not sure which way to go for this one but i do believe in self control, I believe it is up to you to decided if you are a believer in religion. I myself am a born again christian, i was baptised in march 2009, i had spent a while looking in to what i believe and was never pushed into it by my family, i was always told it is my decision what i chose and nothing would change whatever i chose. My MR was christened as a baby and so he is a christian but he says he is a non believer, this doesn't change my feelings for him. I also believe that you chose what to do, it bothers me when someone has killed someone because they were drunk or on drugs and they say they didn't know what they were doing, well you decided to take the drink and/or the drugs knowing that they would become so out of it that they do not know what they are doing therefor not knowing if they have done wrong, they chose to do it so they should be punished like they would if they killed without being under the influence of narcotics. One of the big things i believe in is something that i got a controversial talking to before i left my church, at my church they are ok with divorce and drinking alcohol and having treatment for things like cancer but when they heard that i was being tested for my infertility it was like i was going against gods will, that they don't believe in sex before marriage and then a child should be a gift from god and not from a doctor, but i believe that god has a plan for everyone, that includes gods plan for a doctor to become a fertility specialist and to be able to create a life, and it was my plan to have infertility to learn lessons and to go to these specialists for treatment. I believe if the people from my church don't believe in having the treatment as it would be god saying i am not supposed to have kids then it should be that it was gods will for someone to have cancer and they shouldn't have treatment, if they die then that was gods will.

Day 10-Something you're afraid of

2010-11-03T06:19:00.000-07:00

Well if i am talking about phobias my biggest one is spiders, i don't remember if i liked them as a young kid but i remember when i got terrified of them, i was in primary school and i had put my tights on and gone down stairs then i found there was a huge spider in the leg of them, you know when you don't want to rip tights that's the easiest thing to do but do you think i could rip those tights off......erm no. That was one of the scariest times of my life, there have been so many times since then when my phobia has gotten the better of me. In secondary school we had an animal man come in with some different creatures, he had his blood hound which was so cute, a tiny little honey bear, and eagle and a falcon and then he bought out a bog with a tarantula inside, my tutor knew i didn't like them so asked if he could hold back while i left but he didn't he said it would be good for me to face it, i couldn't move, i was stuck on the chair with about 100 other kids laughing at me while i almost had a heart attack, my tutor was yelling for him to back off which he finally did but i broke down in the middle of the hall with everyone staring at me. Almost everyday at school after that people would try to scare me with spiders, until one art class where we had to draw preserved insects, i thought OK insects are still bad but i can do this, until there was a preserved tarantula, i had to sit in another class to draw my butterfly. that was so embarrassing.

There are a few other things that i am afraid of which are no where near as bad as spiders. One weird one is i cant stand cooked mushrooms, we had a curry a while ago and i normally pick out the mushrooms but this time i poked my fork in and it made a weird squeaking noise, it freaked me out so much i have never touched a mushroom since.

I used to think i was scared of flying because i have so little control up there but that was before i had been on a plane but my first flight was an 8 hour flight to Florida in 2008 and i loved it, it was so much fun we were low enough sometimes to see over new york, and when we were above the clouds it was breath taking.

Day 9-A picture of your friends

2010-11-02T07:27:00.000-07:00

I will be the first to admit that i do not have many friends, yes i do have alot of 'friends' on facebook but the ones who are really there when i need them there are only a few.

First off we have my mom. We do almost everything together, like on Friday we are going to a craft show which should be so much fun.

This picture was taken when we went to the angel of the north last year.

Next we have Amy we met in college and since then i have asked her to be my maid of honour, we don't see enough of each other as she is working and just started uni but whenever we need to we meet up for a drink and a catch up.

When we were in college we were in a tiny group where for most of the 2nd year there was just 6 of us so we were all quite close, here are the rest including our tutor Sally Cowell.

On the back row (l to r) Jess, Sally, Renee, Kayleigh. then front row (l to r) Me, Amy and Hayley. The picture is not great quality but i love it, we had so much fun.

I thought i would put in a picture of some of my friends from school, alot of whom i am 'friends' with on facebook but don't really get to see them.

Here we have the last day of high school, from left to right we have, Daniel, Scott, Daniel, Me and Arron. These were some of my maths friends, we used to all sit in the one corner, i suppose you could call it geek corner lol.

Next we have Me and vicky with fran in the back, we used to go out together at the weekend and it was so much fun they crack me up they really do.

This one has got to have been from when we were about 14, this is Me, Lisa and Mel behind in our form room with my winnie the pooh back pack, lol. i did say i was a geek lol.

This has got me in the mood to upload a whole lot of old pictures so one day when i have the time i am gonna do it.

Day 4-Your parents, Day 5-Your siblings, Day 6-A picture of something that makes you happy, Day 7-Favorite movies, Day 8-A place you've traveled to

2010-11-01T03:27:00.000-07:00

Well i will explain why i haven't been here for a few days, well it is a but of a 'too much information' problem that you really don't need to read about so i will spare you the gory details but all you need to know is i am feeling better. So here is the update.

Day 4-Your parents

First we have my dad, Mark, he is a truck driver and we love to take the mick out of him as you can see from the pictures.

Now here is my mom, Debbie, we work together and she is my best friend, we love to mess about at work with sweeties like the teeth below, we are on the twilight shift and we had there fangs in the sweeties so we decided to take pictures like we were from twilight, lol. I know this is sad but you need to do something.

Day 5-Your siblings

I am not going to fill this with all of my so called siblings as 3 out of the 4 are arse-hole bitches and don't deserve the blog space. So here is my younger brother, Thomas.

Day 6-A picture of something that makes you happy.

This picture always makes me happy just how comfortable we are together and to think in this picture me and Dave had only been together about 3 or 4 months, even then i knew i wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.

Day 7-Favorite movies

My favourite movies change all the time but i do have lots of favourites and here is just a few.
Juno, Labyrinth, My best friends wedding, Beauty and the beast, Freddie got fingered, Willy wonka, Wizard of OZ, Paranormal activity 1 and 2. There are so much more.

Day 8-A place you've traveled to.

In 2008 we went to Florida for our first holiday together on our own. It was awesome, we went to all the different parks.

Day 3-your first love.

2010-10-27T04:45:00.001-07:00

When i was in school i had a few boyfriends who i thought at the time i loved. It was only when i agreed to meet up with Dave that the feelings were so intense that i realised that i felt very strongly for the other guys (who in their defence were awesome guys but it just didn't work out i was never cheated on or anything like that and i still talk to them) but the feelings were so much different this time. That's when i knew i was going to spend the rest of my life with him.

Day 2-Meaning behind your blog name

2010-10-26T03:35:00.000-07:00

Well the meaning of my blog is pretty self explanatory, it is a blog (mostly) about my big day in preparation, i wanted somewhere that i could have my little rants and ideas all on one place and just so that maybe not now but in the future people will want to take inspiration from it.

Day 1-Introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts.

2010-10-25T05:28:00.000-07:00

Here is my second 30 day challenge.
Day 1-Introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts.

Right, my name is Amy and i am 23 years old, i live in Dudley which is in the UK. I currently live at home with my parents and little brother younger brother, (i keep calling him my little brother but he is not so little any more he is taller than me). I have a puppy called Mimi, a rabbit called bob and 2 chip monks called chip and monk. I am engaged to an amazing guy and we have our wedding booked for September 2012 3 days after i turn 25. I love to read, i have done since i was very young i ready the hobbit and lord of the rings by the time i was 10 and i like to read at least one book a month but sometimes if i have a busy month or it is a very log book i wont pressure myself too much. I also love watching American shows like 18 kids and counting and just started watching a new one called 'quints by suprise' it isn't on TV over here yet but i watch it online. I also love food shows like 'diners, drive-ins and dives' and 'man vs food' i think this could be the reason i find it hard to lose weight as i love cooking.I enjoy taking my dog for a walk but hate it when she wont sit at the kerb, i think its because its too cold on her but, lol.

Here is a recent picture of me:

This is me, obviously, me and my mom did a midnight walk for the Mary Stevens hospice which my grandad has been helping with for quite a few years and they like it if people would dress up, well me being me i had to go out and get me a new costume so i decided on a bee, my mom went as a hula girl (with leggings and a tshirt underneath as it was the middle of the night and we are not that into showing our wiggly bits lol.). it was so much fun.

Now my 15 interesting facts.

I am ever so slightly addicted to Pepsi max, i drink it everyday.

I was paralysed from the waist down for 2 days when i was 18 after a car accident.

I keep it a secret from most of the people i know that i am infertile and am waiting for IVF (so if you are reading this and know me please don't say anything on facebook, i don't want everyone talking about me any more than they already do)

I am debt free!

I have an OCD that irritates me so much, i cant help but sing a song if just the mention of it comes up, or a TV advert, or just a saying from a movie, i just have to do it and i get annoyed with myself about it.

I am a very emotional person but i don't really show it.

I am a secret nerd, geek, swat, dork, you get the picture.

I have read the bible in full, (not in the right order but i don't feel this is necessary)

I plan on going to uni after i am married to do forensic science.

I wanted to do my work experience in a morgue where they make-up the dead people. but they said they couldn't just in case we were emotionally scared from it, lol.

My mom is my best friend.

I love Lillie's.

I enjoy working in a factory, yes i know that sounds weird but i do.

I haven't seen my bedroom floor so much in the past 10 years than i have in the last 2 months since getting my dog.

I proved the bra show wrong when i was measured for a bra. they measured me as a 40D, when i tried it on it was too big round but way to small in the cups so i went back to my usual size which is 36/38 FF/G this all depends on where i get my bras from and what style they are.

Day 30: a dream for the future

2010-10-22T09:20:00.000-07:00

Wow i am done with this challenge already. I have found another one which i will post this list after this final day then start either tomorrow or Monday.

Day 30: a dream for the future.

My dream for the future is in most part for the next 2/3 years, i am dreaming for the successful IVF, (or the miracle of natural conception) for my wedding to be the great day i am hoping it will be and to be settling into life as a wife, mother and not quite so crazy lady lol.

Day 1-Introduce, recent picture, 15 interesting facts

Day 2-Meaning behind your blog name

Day 3-Your first love

Day 4-Your parents

Day 5-Your siblings

Day 6-A picture of something that makes you happy

Day 7-Favorite movies

Day 8-A place you've traveled to

Day 9-A picture of your friends

Day 10-Something you're afraid of

Day 11-Favorite tv shows

Day 12-What you believe

Day 13-Goals

Day 14-A picture you love

Day 15-Bible verse

Day 16-Dream house

Day 17-Something you're looking forward to

Day 18-Something you regret

Day 19-Something you miss

Day 20-Nicknames

Day 21-Picture of yourself

Day 22-Favorite city

Day 23-Favorite vacation

Day 24-Something you've learned

Day 25-Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs

Day 26-Picture of your family

Day 27-Pets

Day 28-Something that stresses you out

Day 29-3 Wishes

Day 30-a picture

There are a few points on this one that will be similar to the 30 day challenge i have just finished but there are a lot of different ones too and it gets me blogging even if i don't have much to blog about.

Day 28: whats in your handbag/purse and Day 29 - hopes,dreams and plans for the next 365 days

2010-10-21T05:34:00.001-07:00

Day 28: whats in your handbag/ purse.

Love this one as i have so much in my bag that it may take a while, lol.

My handbag is a juno cross body patent bag in electric blue. (below is a picture from google not my actual bag.)

This bag it awesome its like mary poppins bag.

3 hospital letters (appointment, SA info, IVF guidelines)
a pay slip
a cd with pictures i had printed at boots
tum tums
purse
small bag with tampons (forgot to take out now i have moon cup)
anti bacterial hand wash
deodorant
perfume
eye drops
small bottle mouth wash
small tub face cream
small empty tub
concealer
organic detoxing foundation
breath spray
nail file
house keys
half pack halls soothers
3 lolly pops
bra extension
4 used cinema tickets (inception, sex and the city 2, the last exorcism and devil)
17 used bus tickets
4 boots weight receipts
7 doggy treats
doggy poop bags
I didn't realise just how much i do have in my bag, lol, wow.

Day 29: my hopes dreams and plans for the next 365 days.

This for me is mostly focused around fertility treatment, there will be normal day to day things like spending time with my family and that sort of thing but i am trying so hard with my weight so that i am healthy for IVF, i am also trying to read as much as i can so that i know as much as possible so that there are no nasty surprises around the corner. I am debt free now so i am concentrating on paying for my wedding too which isn't in the next 365 days but if i was asked this again after the 365 days is up then i think it would be different as i am hoping and praying that and treatment we are given will work in the next 365 days and so after that i wouldn't have as much to be stressed about, but i know from statistics and other peoples blogs that the hoping and praying doesn't always come through.

Day 27: your worst habit

2010-10-19T15:03:00.001-07:00

Before i get on to day 27 i just need to explain about where day 26 is. well its on where, i decided with the week i have had i can hardly remember if it happened last week or 3 weeks ago and i really don't want to try to remember it all and put it on here, i know i am sort of cheating on the challenge but i have managed them all so far so i think i am allowed.
Day 27
I would have to say my worst habit would have to be putting myself down, i cant help it i have done it for so long now that i don't realise i do it, i do it all the time. i don't think there really is any thing else i can say about this as it is quite self explanatory. My other worse habit is the exact same thing as my OCD which is bursting into song or spouting of a quote mid conversation when a word or phrase sets me off.

Day 25: your day in detail

2010-10-17T13:25:00.000-07:00

Here goes (there is a few things i left out like using the bathroom and things like that as nobody really wants to know that):
I woke up this morning at about half past 8 with the dog whining to go out so i got up took her down stairs and gave her breakfast and opened the back door. i went back up to bed just for another hour as it is a Sunday, i ended up sleeping till 12:05, its OK my mom was making dinner, i was woken by the woman next door shouting over the fence saying something about a dog then my dad leaving the house and then coming back so i started to get dresses when my mom called me on the intercom (yes we have intercom phones in almost every room in the house as its better than waking the babies next door by shouting up stairs) to say my dinner was done, so me and the MR got up and went down stairs, it turns out it was my dog that had gotten into her garden, so she had to be shut inside, i sat down to have my dinner, pulled pork, stuffing, cauliflower, sprouts (yes i love my veg who'd of though) roast potatoes and gravy. Then i did the dogs dinner. Then we worked out where the dog had got through to next door it turns out she is small enough to fit through the little gaps in the wire fence then through the bush the other side. So we got a long piece of rope and linked it to her harness and tied it in the house, she really didn't like it as she couldn't go very far. Then my dad said about calling the guy to get new fence, i asked how much just the stuff would cost to do it as we have done my brothers fence before so it shouldn't be too hard but he was adamant that the hedge would have to come out but i dint see why as it in on next doors side so she can sort it. but he was having none of it. Then me and the MR watched some movies. Then we gave the dog a bath and sat in the living room drying her, she isn't allowed in the living room unless she is on the sofa as we have new carpet and my dad doesn't want 'mess' on it. Then it was time for the MR to head home so i took the opportunity to take the dog out so we walked to the bus station then back home, do you think she would sit at any road i came across on the way back, erm no i had to hold down her butt. When i got back i gave her supper and came on the net and checked my AOL email and my yahoo email, then facebook then came on here to update you guys. When i am finished this i will be copying it to stick on my other blog that i am also doing the 30 day challenge and then read all the updates from everyone. Then i will settle down and watch TV before taking the dog up to bed and go to sleep.

Weight loss page

2010-10-16T12:28:00.000-07:00

As you can see i have places a new page near the top of my blog with the heading weight loss. I know i have said that i wasn't really that bothered about losing weight just wanting to tone up, well i went to my fertility specialist on Thursday and we found out some not so great news, the MR's results were not so good, meaning the clomid treatment cannot happen and IUI would not work so we were referred to the IVF specialist to be put on the waiting list. They gave us a form with all the criteria that we had to meet before we could have IVF, this was we had to be over 23 (i just turned 23 nearly a month ago) we had to be trying for over 3 years (its been nearly 3 and half years), we have to be non-smokers (neither of us smoke or have ever smoked), neither of us could have children already (neither of us do), and one main thing is my BMI can not be below 19 or above 30, if it is then they will turn us away (i am currently 29 but different scales tell me different things). Because of this i am aiming to be a BMI of at most 27 this way i will be well within the limits. This shouldn't make much of a difference to my wedding dress if i stay at that weight but right now if it means my dress doesn't fit but i have the longed for baby then i would get a different dress, the dress will be there for one day but the baby is in my prayers everyday.

Day 24: where i live.

2010-10-16T03:45:00.000-07:00

I live in a town called Dudley. it is in the West midlands, right in the middle of that little red bit above.

View Larger Map

I live in the house right at the end of the block witht he blue door. I have lived here for nearly 11 years now.

I live 5 minute walk away from the town centre which is right next to Dudley zoo and castle.

After living here all my life and seeing it from my door step its only when i see it in a picture that i realise just how lucky i am to have something like this right on my door step, it really is beautiful.

Just down the road from the zoo is the Black country living museum, i used to love going there when i was younger, it isn't like other museums they have taken old buildings and transport them to there, it is like a little town, they have an old style fish and chip shop, traditional sweets all made the same way they used to in the 1800's with the little metal presses. The people who work there are all in period clothes, its so much fun.

A short drive from my town is Merry hill shopping centre where you can get almost everything.

Then finally not too far away (about half an hour due to the heavy traffic) we have the world famous Bullring centre in Birmingham.

Like i have said, as i have lived here for all my life i don't always appreciate it but really i am quite lucky to live somewhere that has quite a lot of character

Day 23: a youtube video

2010-10-15T14:02:00.000-07:00

Wow this one is going to be quite good, this video will always put a smile on my face as i explained on the challenge day for website, i just didnt want to ruin it for today when i can post the video that will always put a smile on my face even after the news i got yesterday, so here it is.

Day 22: a website

2010-10-14T03:52:00.000-07:00

This would have to be between Blogger, facebook and youtube.

Blogger because i just love reading all the blogs either about TTC or wedding planning, it takes my mind off my problems even if it is for a few minutes, i would say i read up almost everyday.

Facebook because a lot of my friends have gone away to uni and some i just don't get to see so i can just stay up to date with them.

Youtube because even when i feel really down i can always find a funny video on there that brings me around.

Day 21: a recipe.

2010-10-13T07:02:00.000-07:00

Today is a recipe but i really cant think of just one that i want to do so i am going to do a 3 course.

First course: butternut squash and pumpkin soup. (this has no measurements as it is my recipe that i made so it is done by taste)

A small pumpkin

Small butternut squash

Quarter of an onion

2 Potatoes

Half pot of single cream

Chicken stock

Salt and pepper to taste

Half the butternut squash and remover all there seeds, place both sides cut side up on a baking tray.

Section the pumpkin and remove the seeds and remove the skin, place the sections on a baking tray.

Bake both until soft.

Peel the potatoes and cut into small sections and boil till soft.

Cut the onion small then fry until they start to colour.

Cut the pumpkin and squash into small chunks and place in the chicken stock with the onions and potatoes and reduce.

Put all into a blender until smooth.

Add the cream to a pan and heat till mixed.

Add salt and pepper to taste.

Serve with crusty bread.

Second course: Thyme for chicken for 2. (again not really have measurements just trial and error)

2 Medium to large chicken breasts.

4 Slices of Italian pancetta (you can use bacon or other thin meats.)

Cheese of your choice (i have used cheddar, mozzarella or Parmesan before)

2 sprigs of thyme

Take the chicken breasts one at a time and place between cling wrap.

Bash with a rolling pin until half inch thick.

Strip the thyme from the stalk and lightly sprinkle over the chicken.

Finely grate the cheese onto the chicken.

Wrap the chicken with the pancetta (or other meat) and press.

Lightly oil a pan and fry until outer meat is crisp. (check the chicken is cooked too)

Serve with a light BBQ sauce and a baked potato or side salad.

Third course: chocolate fondant. (these measurements are to make around 4 depending on the size of ramekins.)

170g margarine

170g caster sugar

110g self raising flour

85g cooking chocolate powder

3 eggs

Sieve together the flour and chocolate powder.

Cream together the margarine and sugar into a bowl.

In a separate bowl beat the eggs.

Mix together the eggs with the margarine and sugar mix.

Add flour mix one table spoon at a time.

oil the inside of the ramekins and dust with the chocolate powder.

Divide into ramekins and place in the oven on gas mark 4 for 10 - 12 minutes.

When just firm to the touch turn them out onto a plate and serve with ice cream of your choice.

Well there is my recipes, it would be so awesome if i could go on to master chef or a show like that i have my menu planned already.

Day 20 - a hobby of yours

2010-10-12T16:03:00.000-07:00

Well i am just about in time for today as it is 11:53pm so i have a few minutes, a hobby of mine would have to be making things. Yes i know that is very vague but i do like to make almost anything, cakes, cards, wedding projects and flower arrangements and bouquets. i took a short course in flower arranging mainly so i had some sort of in sight of what would work for my wedding flowers and since then i have made numerous bouquets for different people and occasions. I love to make cakes so much i could bake all day, big cakes, small cakes, birthday cakes well cakes for any reason. that could be part of the reason i find it harder to manage my weight lol.

So see you tomorrow.

Day 18: my wedding/future wedding/past wedding and Day 19 a talent of yours.

2010-10-11T04:54:00.000-07:00

Well i missed a day again so here is 2 for you.

Day 18: my wedding/future wedding/past wedding.
Well this is pretty easy just read the rest of my blog from the beginning you can find everything about my wedding so far its going to be awesome.

Day 19: a talent of yours.
I have a few talents that are not great like playing the piano and the double bass, but i have to give the strangest one i can think of, so here goes.
When i was younger i was riding my brothers bike when someone drove a remote controlled car in front of me and i was not able to stop so i went head first over the handlebars and cut up all my face. in doing so i think i might have broken my nose as it used to have a little bump in it but now there isn't but we never found out if it was broken or not. Well since then if i wiggle my nose in a certain way i can catch the nerve and cause myself to sneeze, lol. i know why would you need to do this but it served me well when i was in high school and didn't want to go to school i could look like i had the flu or something, i still sometimes do it now if i don't want to do something i will make myself sneeze and get out of it, it doesn't always get me out of it though, lol.

Day 17: and art piece (painting, sculpture, etc).

2010-10-09T11:10:00.000-07:00

I would have to say my favourite art piece would have to Andy Worhol with Marilyn Monroe.

Day 16 part 2

2010-10-09T10:57:00.001-07:00

As I said yesterday the 2 songs that make me cry or tear up everytime I listen to them are 'Held' and 'In better hands' by Natalie Grant. Hear is the video for 'In better hands'.

Here is the video for 'held'.

Day 16: a song that makes you cry (or nearly)

2010-10-08T16:09:00.000-07:00

There are a couple of songs that bring me so close to tears and these are both Natalie Grant, the one is on my top 5 songs i did in this challenge that is called held then the other one is called better hands now, i will do a bit more of a post on these 2 songs tomorrow but it is late and the dog wont let me carry on so i will leave you for now. see you tomorrow.

Finally!!!!!!

2010-10-07T03:00:00.000-07:00

Well i had a loan 3 years ago and decided to split the payments over weeks instead of months just because i get paid weekly so it was just easier, well as this is the case when it is a 5 week month (whenever there is 5 Fridays in a month) i cancel one of the payments so that i get that money to myself. Well yesterday was the day that i have to ring them so that they can stop this weeks payment, so i ring up the guy and give him my name post code and password on my account and he asked if i only had one loan with them, which i do, and he said he just needs to check the details again, so i gave him my name, postcode and password and he said that it is showing that the balance was £0, i thought they had got this wrong as i was supposed to be paying for it till like march, but he said there isn't any more payments due and i could cancel the direct debit at my bank. i logged onto my online banking and sure enough the direct debit had been canceled. It turns out because i had divided it up i was paying more so it was paid off a lot quicker. Go me, for the past like 3 years i have been trying so hard to not be in debt so most of my spare money has been spent on paying off everything i owe, now after all that i am now debt free other than on going things like phone contract and pet insurance and my laptop which is on a buy now pay next year. This means i will be able to pay off the hotel and seat covers in a matter of weeks and not have to wait for over a year for it to be paid. I am so proud of myself for being able to do that and to have been so disciplined for the past few years to become DEBT FREE!!!!!!!!

Day 15: your dream home

2010-10-07T02:37:00.000-07:00

I can imagine everyone wanting a huge mansion with 10's of rooms and cinemas and games rooms but what really want is a cute little American style home with the little white fence around it. nothing too big just maybe 3 or 4 bedrooms 2 sitting rooms a reasonable size kitchen but one thing it does need is a big enough closet, lol. I know that having this house here in the UK is not going to happen but it would have to be blue too. that's just screams home to me not just a house. Below are some of the sort of house that would be my dream home.

Aaaawwwww they are just so cute, you can just imagine living in a street with a lot of houses that look similar just in different colours, the only problem is over here a house like this would have to be specially made and would probably cost anything from £300,000 to £1million, which i don't think i am going to get any time soon.

Day 14: a non-fiction book

2010-10-06T05:58:00.000-07:00

I am going to have to go with Miley Cyrus's autobiography 'miles to go' for this one, i read this while on my way to snowdon last year and it was awesome, i only put it down when it got too dark to read and my torch ran out, i loved it, i know a lot of people were saying how could a 16 year old girl have enough life experiences to write an autobiography but as she started her career so early she has been through a lot that some of us normal folk wont have been through by the time we are in our 30's so this is the reason she is my choice for non-fiction book.

Day 13: a fiction book.

2010-10-05T06:06:00.000-07:00

I have written about this book in one of the previous challenges and its called kissed by an angel. Below you can find the official write up of it and a cover picture. Kissed by and angel is supposed to be a trilogy but they republished into one.

In a romantic and suspenseful collection of the New York Times bestselling trilogy, love's unbreakable bonds are put to the test.
When her boyfriend, Tristan, died, Ivy thought she'd lost everything, even her faith in angels. But now she's discovered that he's her guardian angel -- his presence so strong that she can feel the touch of his hand, the beat of his heart. Ivy needs Tristan now more than ever because he knows she's in terrible danger. Only Ivy's guardian angel can save her now that his killer is after her.
But if Tristan rescues Ivy, his mission on earth will be finished, and he must leave her behind forever. Will saving Ivy mean losing her just when he's finally reached her again?

Day 12: something you are OCD about.

2010-10-04T05:51:00.000-07:00

I have this really bad OCD of quoting, it can be movies or songs but i have to do it, i have even got to the point where i can be mid sentence and have to say my quote then carry on, my mom has grown to deal with this but things like the following are what happen:

The flash 'AAHHAA' on my camera is broken.
(while baking with my mom) MOM: you only need a spoon full, ME: of sugar helps the medicine go down.
MOM: what time are they working till today? ME: 'workin' 9 to 5' (sang in the style of the great dolly parton)
(while setting up my moms new computer) ME: plug it in plug it in. (like from the air freshener advert)
(this one is a little bit different but i cant help but saying it every time) When i hear Morrisons it always reminds me of Mario so i end up calling it marrisons then insist on doing the theme tune. yes i know but i cant help it.

While i am sat here i am finding it rather hard to think of them but like my mom has just said she cant remember them until i say them anymore as its just so common these days.

Day 10: a photo taken over 10 years ago of you, and Day 11:a photo of you recently.

2010-10-03T02:54:00.000-07:00

I am a day behind but i am doing a double post so here goes.

Day 10: a photo taken over 10 years ago of you.

This photo has got to have been from when i was about 3 or 4 so it is nearer 20 years old but its over 10 years. My mom used to get novelty knitting patterns and knit me loads of jumpers and as i love having my photo taken i was more than willing to strike a pose. I am so glad my parents had cameras when i was growing up. I am such a little poser i cant help it, lol.

Day 11: A photo of you recently.

This photo was taken about 2 months ago when i was out looking for the right tiara for my wedding, i wish my hair was longer and i was wearing some make-up but i just love my tiara, that's why i chose this picture.

Day 9: a photo i took.

2010-10-01T07:33:00.000-07:00

I have 2 favourite photos that i have taken that i just have to put both of them here.

This first picture looks so exotic like i had been to Asia but it was actually taking while waiting for a ride at Animal Kingdom in Florida. Me and the Mr went there in 2008 and i couldnt believe all the different things there was to take pictures of, i went like 6000 miles in one direction but came back with pictures that look like i went 6000 miles in the other direction. I just love this picture though.

The next picture is one i took at the begining of this week, the Mr had got me a huge bouquet of flowers for my birthday and they had just started to bloom so when one was fully open i had to take a picture of it, they were so beautiful. My mom saw this picture and said it looks like it could have been a proffesional picture, all this from a £100 camera.

Day 8: a photo that makes you angry/sad

2010-09-30T16:45:00.000-07:00

The photo that makes me sad isnt exactly a photo of mine but when ever i see that negative it makes me so sad its unbelievable. I am so sad that i will only ever see this out come.

Day 7: a photo that makes you happy.

2010-09-29T05:52:00.000-07:00

My photo that makes me happy is this:

This was taken in the january as we got engaged in the february of 2008. I had booked us in for a photo shoot. What was different about this shoot was the photographer told us to play around for most of the pictures and she would capture loads of movement shots and pick some of the best. this one the MR was on the floor and i was kneeling over his back and attacking his ear, i think it came out so well. The Mr has this one blown up onto a huge canvas that is on his bedroom wall and i had 15 other pictures some posed ones and some action ones set in an album. They were very expensive but well worth it. My profile picture is one of the pictures in the album.

Come back for day 8.

Day 5: my favourite quote and day 6: 20 of my favourite things.

2010-09-28T14:39:00.000-07:00

Day 5: my favourite quote.

I have a few quotes but one of them would have to be quoting the funniest band in the world madness,
'It's all egg bacon beans and a friiiiiiiiiiiied sliiiiiiiiice.' lol. I just have to shout that when ever its on in the car i just have to.

The next one is the saying for cadbury's flake.
'Only the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate, tastes like chocolate ever tasted before.' Love it.

And finally we have the ever famous quote from Forrest Gump who, while say on the bench, quotes his own mother saying,
'Momma said life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you gonna get.' Which is so true.

Day 6: 20 of my favourite things.

My ever loving Mr, who has put up with my spoiled ways and bratty attitude and come throught my infertility battle with me.
My mom who is my best friend, we do so much together, we live together until i am married, we shop together, and we work together, i really dont know where i would be if my mom wasnt around. She has also been through my infertility too.
My puppy Mimi, event though i have only had her around 4 weeks she has stollen my heart, she has learned so much in such a small time, If you havnt already read about her, She is a king charles spaniel and is just about 12 weeks.
My blogs, i used to just have an annonomus blog somewhere else but i didnt feel like i was really using it to my advantage so i thought i would start 2 new ones where i can cross reference somethings but have a main objective in each so someone who wants to read about infertility and the journey can read the one and someone who wants to check out my wedding journey can check out the other one.
Clothes, before i comited myself to different things i had a lot of dispencable cash so once pay day came around i would be off to the shopping centre and spending, i only recently had to clear out over half of my clothes as they were either too worn, or not suitable, and i didnt have the space for them, but they will still be one of my favourite things.
Shoes, as with above i own so many pairs of shoes i have no idea how many i have, but i love shoes, what more can i say im a girl.
Movies, I own so many movies its great, i am the sort of person who can watch a movie over and over and not get bored, i like most types of movies and will give them all a chance.
My book collection, its huge, i learned to read from a very young age and by the time i was 7 i had read the hobbit and lord of the rings, one of the earliest books i remember reading was watership down when i was about 6, i remember this because they didnt have a copy in the lower school so i had to go into the year 6 (which is age 10 or 11) to get the book. i loved it apart from when i switched school and they wouldnt allow me to read older kids books and had to read what the other kids was reading so when i was in year 6 i had to sit around and re-read watership down and i got so irritated i told everyone what happens in the end, lol. I know this was a little bit out of order but if they let me read books to my level then i wouldnt have needed to do it would i.
My other animals, I have a rabbit called Bob, a russian hamster called Lil H (little houdini as she was able to escape numerous times from a sealed tank both a plastic one and a glass one) and then we have 2 chipmonks who can be quite annoying when they start to shreak.
Cheese, i love cheese, i could introduce cheese into everything i eat, there are a few cheeses i really cant stand though, anything with veins in it, or that has matured for too long, it is too acidy for me.
My cute pink notebook laptop, i have a normal size laptop that is just plain silver and was quite small when i bought it but over time it got viruses and just got a little bit slow so i got me a new one, and it is so cute and small i can fit it in my handbag.
Home made chocolate cake, i love to make it, with the chocolate fudge filling. mmmmm slightly warmed with ice cream its pure heaven.
Sky, no not the thing above you my sky in my bedroom, as i still live at home sometimes i dont get to watch what i want on the regular tv so i have to go upstairs to watch it but i have the same channels up there as we do down stairs so thats ok, and the best plus point is i can indulge in as much disney channel as i like with out anyone moaning at me, lol.
Google, i love google so much its reduculous. My mom knows if she wants to know anything she can just ask me and i will be more than happy to spend hours finding useless things out on there, i know i am a bit of a geek, ok ok a lot of a geek but i just cant help it.
My bedroom, this is one thing that i love for selfish reasons as my brother is always moaning that we pay the same amount of money to my parents each week but he only has a small room while i have the master bedroom, this being when i was younger i always had to share my bedroom with my sister so we needed the bigger room, and he always had a room to his self so he didnt need such a big one.
Marmite, enough said.
Burger king XL bacon double cheese burgers, beofre i met my Mr i dont remember going to BK but he always went there instead of maccies so as soon as i took that first bite i was in heaven.
Sweeties, i have a very sweet tooth so you can always find sweets in my hand bag and my work bag.
Facebook, not because i spend all day on there but some of the things you read on there is more entertaining than tv, and alot of pot calling the kettle black moments.
Finally i had to leave one of the best till last, i love this thing so much if i dont encounter it in a day i get edgy, (not quite) this is the ulimate.....Pepsi max, it cant be regular pepsi or diet it has to be pepsi max there is no contest, i go through about 8 litres in a week, i love it.

Come back tomorrow for day 7.

Day 4: my favourite book

2010-09-26T14:07:00.001-07:00

Here i am again, and i gotta do my top 5 as i hate singling out just the one.
First, my all time favourite book as of last year is, Kissed by an angel. There were so many parts that were so awesome i didn't want to book to end. It is a story about this girl who's boyfriend dies in a car accident but then he comes back as a presence for 'unfinished bussiness'. It is one everyone should read at least once.
The second in my top 5 is, Thirteen reasons why. Again i cried quite a few times during this book. Its about a girl who killed herself but left behind some tapes, with little stories about thirteen people that had a hand in driving her to killing herself.
Next on my list is an older book by Judy Blume called, Forever. Its a story set in the 70's about discovering sexuality and a very good read.

Then we have The life of Riley. Well this one is a bit of a cheat really as its not just the one book it is the whole series that i love, i think there is like 6 books but great books.
Finally it has to be another collection, this time its , Dr Seuss. I don't care how old i get i will never be too old for green eggs and ham, the cat in the hat or the cat in the hat comes back.
Tomorrow day 5.

Day 3: my favourite television program

2010-09-25T12:35:00.000-07:00

Here i am again and i just have to put my top 5 up here as i cant just pick one.

First up on my list has to be 18 kids and counting. I find this program awesome, just how a couple could have 18 (its 19 now but we haven't had the episodes with the 19th baby yet) kids what are go well mannered and educated is amazing. I couldn't fault this family or the program at all.

Second has to be family guy. this never fails to make me laugh, and the fact that the sister looks like Dave's ex its funny. lol.

Next we have Hannah Montana, yes i know it is a kids show but i am a big kid at heart and i don't think that will ever change.

Then there is Sonny with a chance, again another Disney channel show but it has some awesome young talent.

Finally we have a show that is finished now but i loved watching it, the story was great the outfits were perfect and just a fun program. This is Pushing daisies.

Come back again tomorrow for day 4.

Day 3: favourite movie.

2010-09-24T06:57:00.001-07:00

As with yesterday i have so many movies that i will have to pick a top 5.
First we have the ultimate movie of all time well joint first with the one below. Wizard of oz. Need i say more, i have the limited edition DVD with a musical cover. Love it.
Joint first is Romeo and Juliet. It is just the greatest love story in history.
Next is labyrinth. I used to watch this almost every week when i was younger, so much so that the video wore out and we had to buy another one.
Forth is Juno, this movie is hilarious. When i first saw it i ended up watching it twice in one day. Pure awesome.
Finally in my top 5 is Beauty and the Beast. I am a sucker for Disney. I will watch Disney movies till i am old and decrepit, i will always have an inner child.
Come back tomorrow for Day 3.

Day 1: my favourite song.

2010-09-23T07:31:00.000-07:00

This is i little bit hard as i have a few so i will just put my top 5.

My favourite as of this week is, Introducing me by Nick Jonas in Camp Rock 2.

This song is so cool i have had it on repeat for about 3 hours at work for the past 3 days, i think i am a little bit obsessed lol.

The next song is The phantom of the opera by Sarah Brightman and Antonio Banderas.

I originally wanted to have this (or at least the beginning part) as i walked down the aisle but i don't think many people would really understand.

Then there is Held by Natalie Grant.

This is in my top 5 because when i was having the most trouble dealing with infertility a really nice girl at church pointed me in the direction of this song, i had listened to Natalie Grants music before but not come across this one, it made me feel a little bit better knowing that no matter how hard things get i am being held and there is some reason behind this.

At number 4 is the theme to shrek, It is you (i have loved) by Dana Glover.

I absolutely love this song, i am hoping this will be our first dance song.

And last but by no means least is What a wonderful world by Louis Armstrong.

This is the other contender for our first dance song, (This was done by someone on YouTube i just borrowed it to show what we wanted to do. So thanks who ever did this.) We wanted to take our own pictures and do a slide show similar to this using our pictures and our baby pictures and us growing up.

There is my top 5 come back tomorrow for day 2: my favourite movie.

The 30 day challenge

2010-09-23T07:23:00.000-07:00

So i have been reading this blog called http://hopeafourletterword.blogspot.com/ and have been reading along the past 20 or so days and she has been doing this 30 day challenge where each day for 30 days she posts a picture or a little something about her life, i thought i would have a go but when i started reading about it i was in the process of getting my puppy which was a little bit hectic so i thought i would wait a little while but i think i will start today.
Here’s the rundown:
Day 1 - your favorite song
Day 2 - your favorite movie
Day 3 - your favorite television program
Day 4 - your favorite book
Day 5 - your favorite quote
Day 6 - 20 of my favorite things.
Day 7 - a photo that makes you happy
Day 8 - a photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 9 - a photo you took
Day 10 - a photo taken over 10 years ago of you
Day 11 - a photo of you recently
Day 12 - something you are OCD about
Day 13 - a fictional book
Day 14 - a non-fictional book
Day 15 - your dream house
Day 16 - a song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17 - an art piece (drawing, sculpture, painting, etc)
Day 18 - my wedding/future wedding/past wedding
Day 19 - a talent of yours
Day 20 - a hobby of yours
Day 21 - a recipe
Day 22 - a website
Day 23 - a youtube video
Day 24 - where I live
Day 25 - your day, in great detail
Day 26 - your week, in great detail
Day 27 - my worst habit
Day 28 - what's in my handbag/purse
Day 29 - hopes,dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 - a dream for the future
Check my next post for day 1.

Time is ticking

2010-09-22T04:30:00.000-07:00

As of midnight last night we have less than 2 years till out wedding day....EEEEEEPPPPPPPP. I'm so excited, to some people 2 years may sound like a long time but thinking in the terms of how quick this last year has gone and all the things we have planned already it will be here in no time at all. I have been reading a blog about a really nice girl who has just come back from her honeymoon in Hawaii and it looks so amazing, i was thinking that we may take a few day of our honeymoon to go there, we were thinking of going back to Florida as we had so much fun but there were a few things we didn't do, we fed the dolphins but didn't swim with them, and we never went to Busch gardens but mostly everything we did do was so great we would do it all again. There are a few things we wont be doing again. One would be we are not going to listen to thew rep when they say i wont need my factor 50 suncream, i am very pail and burn very easily and this is what happened when we followed their advice and only went with a factor 25, never again we were in so much pain we had to take advantage of the 2 double beds in our hotel so that we didn't hit each other in our sleep.

This was in the second week after the swelling had gone down a little but still a bit swollen and painful.

This one was back at our hotel after going to the aquatica water park, which was where we got the most of the burns from. As you can see from this picture i am naturally vary pale so this was not good, i wore a strapless one piece and so i had a strange burnt circle on my back too where there was a gap in the costume. we definitely wont be going to another water park, yes it was fun but that was just 3 days into the holiday so the pain was there till we came home, also i had my purse stolen there too with a lot of money in it too, i had to ring home as ask my parents to wire us more money, we couldn't claim from the insurance either as it would cost us too much as we needed to report it to the local police then pay for a copy of the report then pay for a report from the water park, this would have just eaten up our remainder money and time.

I also wanted to go to hooters....yes i know its more of a guys place but i have always wanted to go since i saw it on 'married with children' if i was thinner i would so work their, its cool, but as we were a little tight on money we couldn't go so we will be doing that next time. We also wanted to go to the different themed restaurants like the pirate one. I would like to go down to Miami for the day too.